"Family Guy" sucks. Allow me to elaborate.

Once I pledge my allegiance to a show, I rarely turn my back on it. For example, I still watch "Saturday Night Live" and have rarely missed a new episode of "The Simpsons" in the past decade and a half despite their ups and downs.

However, I am about to turn my back on "Family Guy," mainly because I feel as though "Family Guy" has turned its back on me. "SNL" and "The Simpsons" get credit for trying — an A for effort.

On the other hand, I get the sense "Family Guy" is completely on autopilot and not even trying to entertain me anymore. When I watch now, it's as if Seth MacFarlane says, "No need for a compelling storyline to thread the non sequiturs together. They're random. They're obscure. They're funny and can carry the show. By the way, I love money." The current season of "Family Guy" gets an F for effort.

Let us travel back to the show's premiere following some "Super Bowl" in 1999 between the Denver Broncos and Atlanta Falcons. I don't care about football and only remember who played because of the hilarious "Simpsons" joke in which Homer and his bar pals put mugs in front of their mouths with the teams' names added later.

I recall watching "Family Guy" after this Super Bowl and the "Simpsons" episode and immediately falling in love. From that day on, I made it a point to watch new episodes. In fact, I also predicted it was not going to last and began recording each episode onto VHS. Keep in mind, this was before the TV-on-DVD and TV-on-the-Internet booms, or at least before I was savvy to their possible existence.

According to my VHS catalog, the earliest episode I recorded on its original airdate was "Chitty Chitty Death Bang," the third episode and one of the best. This was back when Lacey Chabert was the voice of Meg instead of the barely tolerable Mila Kunis, although both are awful choices to voice the character.

Once season two came around, I was a full-fledged fanatic. I continued to record episodes. After watching "Death is a Bitch," I sent Stewie an e-mail at his address, [email protected]. Not only did this turn out to be a real e-mail address, but it served as an underground newsletter to keep "Family Guy" on the air for a third season, a movement that I like to think I had a small part.

When the show was canceled, I was devastated. However, at least I had my VHS collection. Soon the DVDs were released, the show caught on, everyone started liking it and finally it was picked up for a fourth season. At first, I was ecstatic. Then I saw the premiere. I was disappointed, but not heartbroken. Then came more episodes. I began to wonder why I liked the show in the first place.

To find out, I watched the first season again. The contrast between the old and the new episodes lies mainly in the frequency and efficiency at which flashbacks and non sequiturs are used. The old episodes used these devices when they either furthered the plot or were seamlessly inserted in a way that didn't demand explanation, whereas new episodes force in these moments.

Also, recent episodes rely too much on bringing back characters that were funny during their first appearance, but do not function well as regulars. For example, Greased-up Deaf Guy and Evil Monkey references are getting depressing and embarrassing.

Another thing I notice about new episodes is their dependence on jokes that go on for longer than they should. This can be funny if done correctly.

For example, in the second season episode "Wasted Talent," Peter trips and hurts his knee. He goes on to make the same pained noise for quite some time. This is funny. It works. Later, he gets kicked by a Chumbawumba and makes the same noise. This time, it does not go on forever. The reference to the previous joke is enough, and this works.

However, if this were to occur in a recent episode, both instances of the noise would go on forever, rendering the second occurrence annoying and unfunny. Earlier this season in the episode "Mother Tucker," Stewie and Brian get a radio show. This is a great premise with endless possibilities, but several times throughout the episode, they dwell on the "morning radio shows have really long introductions complete with wacky noises and echoed voices" joke. This appeared so many times, I seriously lost count. The observation was mildly amusing the first time, but got more annoying every time it arose. This example is merely a microcosm of the macrocosm that is the show's recent crappiness.

To give "Family Guy" some credit, last Sunday's episode addressed both of my first two concerns. At one point, the vaudeville duo (characters I have hated from the beginning) made another appearance. I was this close to changing the channel when Stewie suddenly shot them both dead, then asked the viewers if they were happy now. Yes Stewie, I was happy. Now go shoot your staff and hire competent writers.

Later, Stewie made an analogy with Peter going after a hockey coach. There was a brief pause, and then Stewie asked if a clip was going to be played. He realized there was no clip and continued. The reason I describe these moments is because they show that at least "Family Guy" is aware of its flaws, which is the first step to fixing them. Unfortunately, I don't see this happening.

As if the show's diminishing quality isn't enough, "Family Guy" DVDs are not being released in complete seasons anymore in an apparent attempt to take advantage of their so-called hardcore fan base. Volumes Three and Four constitute the fourth season. When combined, they cost a whopping $50 or more; $50 for one season of a half-hour animated show? This is ludicrous, and I refuse to support this in any way. Not to mention, I don't like the episodes contained in the discs.

I still enjoy the first three seasons, and will forever defend their honor, but the recent work has been so subpar, I honestly wish the show never returned. It is tainting the earlier quality work and alienating its previously devoted fans.

To sum up my point, new "Family Guy" sucks. If you want to see "Family Guy" in its heyday, I'll gladly lend you a tape.

Mike Peters is a senior focusing on communication arts, film and business. Want to borrow his old "Family Guy" tapes? Send him an e-mail at [email protected].