I’ve heard my previous bee-jay piece was very well appreciated. By popular demand, here is your follow-up with some basic how-tos for those who like to eat out. I’m watching a sucker fish go to town on the wall of an aquarium as I write this. How fitting. Inspiring, even.

Attitude Adjustment

This should be unnecessary to explain, but I feel we need to get it out of the way. If you ascribe to an identity that is supposedly sexually attracted to people with vulvas and the thought of putting a juicy, pulsing pussy in your mouth is repulsing, you need to re-evaluate your sexuality.

I get that oral is not everyone’s cup of tea, but enthusiasts make for the best muff divers. Tell your partner how much you love the way they taste. Never underestimate how hot it sounds — and feels! — to moan with a mouthful of coochie. Gorge yourself on the folds like you’re actually enjoying yourself.

Get Wet

Pussies produce slippery fluids of their own, but not at first. There’s nothing worse than the fluttery feeling of anticipation as your partner ventures down south being dissipated by a sensation akin to a kitten’s dry, prickly tongue confusingly trying to lap up milk. Collect some spit in your mouth as you approach and use it to prep the area before getting into the technical moves.

You can get some help from a flavored lube to give yourself a tasty treat. Squirt some toward the top where the regular skin turns into the squishy genital skin and watch it slowly trickle down. Careful, though, sugary lube in the vaginal opening can cause yeasties!

Use your face

I’ve said it before and I will say it again. Real pussy eating involves getting your face all up in that shit. Too many straight guys rely on the solitary method of sticking their tongue out to the side and flicking it up and down against the tip of the clitoris. I’m guessing because it’s what they see in porn, not realizing they only do that because it looks good for the camera, not because it feels good for the receiver. Either that or they’re trying to keep neat, which goes back to point No. 1.

You’ve got a nose, chin, lips and cheeks. Use them. Rub your nose gently down the bridge of the clitoral hood. If you’re stubble-free, let your chin drag behind you when you lick from the bottom of the slot to the tippy top. Motorboat it! Get some suction going! Plenty of people find the sensation of getting fucked while getting oral to be heavenly. This is the move that brings a lot of people over the orgasmic cliff. So when you’re both ready, lube up a finger or two — or three! — by getting a quick dip in your mouth. Even hotter, reach up and shove a couple fingers in their mouth if the moment feels right. Slowly slide it and wait for verbal or nonverbal confirmation that it’s good. Then gradually increase the speed and force. You may get tired. Stay the course!

Use your tongue, strategically

Of course, your tongue is also a pretty important part of this equation. Think about how you lick an ice cream cone. A flattened tongue with big, broad strokes skims a lot of surface area while a pointed tongue provides direct, focused attention. Explore by switching these up in lots of different areas.

Keep in mind that people are pretty particular when it comes to how they like to be licked, especially when it comes to clitoral stimulation. Some people are left or right side specific. There are figure-eighters and circly-swirlers. Some people love their clit attended to through the skin of the clitorial hood toward the top, others just fucking love the space right underneath the head, called the frenulum, lavishly tickled. Up and down slow-mo is preferred by many, but others need quick side-to-side action. Communication is key, but one thing is certain — while expertly executed novel moves will get you far, most pussies eventually need a consistent sensation with no switch-ups to make them cum.

Study up!

Becoming a Jedi master of cunnilingus involves absorbing multiple sources of information, including trial and error through personal experience. All I can offer you is a few basics in a 900-word limit! I’ve included a few of my favorite resources below, but a basic anatomy lesson is in demand before advanced sessions. For example, many people are surprise to learn of the clit’s true structure, which has some serious implications for pleasure giving techniques.

Books:

“Ultimate Guide to Cunnilingus” by Violet Blue.

“She Comes First” by Ian Kerner. It’s called “The Thinking Man’s Guide” but anyone with a brain can read it.

Videos:

“How to Eat Pussy Like a Champ,” featuring various stars of the adult variety. This is an hour-and-a-half-long educational porno that can be found on Pornhub for free. NSFW, obvi.

“Cunnilingus Instructional Video” with “explicit sex talk” between two lovers that shows you what kind of questions to ask before the live demonstration.

“The Expert Guide to Oral Sex: Cunnilingus,” with sexpert Tristan Taormino.

Blogs:

“The Vice Guide to Eating Pussy,” which elaborates on some of the advice here.

“Oh Joy Sex Toy” offers a quick, direct, and colorful illustrative step-by-step that gives great tips for giving great head. And it’s my favorite on this list.

Image via Flickr user Johny Blaze