If you have never been to Essen Haus, just on the other side of the Capitol, let me try to paint a simple picture. Think beer. Think lots of good German beer in big steins. Throw in some waitresses in dirndls, waiters in lederhosen, some oompah music, and bam! That is Essen Haus.

Essen Haus is as close to a beer drinkers’ paradise in Madison as you’ll get. It is the type of place where if you love beer — as I happen to — you must watch your step. Take things too far, and the house of cards upon which your sobriety is based will come crashing down.

This past weekend, Essen Haus celebrated Oktoberfest. Many people ask, “Why is Oktoberfest in September?” The answer dates back 192 years.

Traditionally held in Munich, Germany, from the third weekend in September until the first Sunday of October, the event is one non-stop party. Oktoberfest today is celebrated as both an homage to the past and its rich historical traditions, and a celebration of good health for the future.

Originally a wedding party to celebrate the union of King Ludwig I to Princess Theresa, the first Oktoberfest was celebrated with horse races. The races became a tradition, but the good-natured Bavarians, not ones to shy away from a hearty glass of beer themselves, took more to the gigantic beer tents first established in 1896. The beer tents, supported by the breweries, firmly established themselves as an Oktoberfest tradidtion that continues today.

While the celebration in Madison is a far cry from celebrations in Germany, or even nearby LaCrosse, which holds the largest Oktoberfest in the country, we are blessed with Essen Haus.

With a group of friends, we decided to engage in Oktoberfest with the vigor and enthusiasm Wisconsin students know best. We danced the polka to traditional German music. We sang the songs, even if we didn’t know the words. We played the various fair games, like a ring toss over bottles. We caroused and smiled until the sun came down. And yes, we drank some delicious German beer, saying “Prost” with every clink of the souvenir glass.

At Essen Haus, Oktoberfest is a one-day event. There is, however, plenty of fun to be had during the remainder of the year.

In case I haven’t made myself perfectly clear, Essen Haus is famous for beer. Walk inside, and you will find over 3,500 glass and clay beer steins hanging from the ceiling and the walls and sitting on shelves. Many of these belong to the “Stein Club”. For $65 you can become a lifetime member and get one of your very own, along with a variety of other perks.

There are 18 beers on tap, complete with seasonal varieties such as German Oktoberfest beers, which as one would expect, are in prime season. In addition, there are roughly 270 imported beers to choose.

Impressively, Essen Haus serves more German beer than anywhere else in the United States. One contributing factor might be the popularity of its two-liter glass boots.

Boot drinking is the essence of camaraderie, and is in many circles a game of sorts. The boot is passed around a group, with each member taking a sip, and passing it to the next. The design of the boot makes it possible for air to get trapped inside the tip, causing beer to splash upon the face of an inexperienced participant.

It is important to mention the boot drinking has a variety of rules. Sometimes I’ve seen the rotation go clockwise, with the boot never touching the table. But much like roller-skating, one is allowed to change the rotation to keep the game interesting.

The person who finishes the boot second to last is often stuck buying the next one. This turn of events is not tragic, as boots are not terribly expensive, priced around $14.50 for most types or $16.50 if Weiss beer is your preference. Luckily for students, Essen Haus has a student special on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday nights, with all boots priced to move at $10.

If you really want to aim high, they also offer five-liter clay steins, which can be consumed in a similar capacity among friends and strangers alike. The stein is simply huge and has the subtlety of a pink elephant in a china store. With one of these in your hands, you will be noticed.

Moderation is important, and many prefer to opt for the typical half liter glass. Still, these have about 3 ounces more than a traditional pint, and are priced at $2.75 during happy hour Monday through Friday, which lasts from 3 pm to 6:00 pm. Happy hour is extended until midnight Tuesday and Thursday nights.

Essen Haus is the perfect place for celebration, big or small. Just make sure to walk or take a cab!

With the start of the Big 10 football season upon us, Bartime will head over to the Stadium Bar, also affectionately known as Jingles, for a few drinks before the game, at noon, tomorrow, Oct. 5. We’ll probably be there after the game as well. The Stadium Bar is located across from Camp Randall, at 1419 Monroe St. Cheers!