As exams approach and libraries begin to fill to capacity, check out what The Badger Herald has to say about your favorite study spot and all it has to reveal.

College Library

You seek adventure for the journey, not the destination. There’s no other conceivable reason you would subject yourself to climbing three flights of stairs, circling each floor and then making the same round back downstairs, knowing full well the odds of finding a table at College are about as high as the odds of ever accomplishing anything while there.

A deep passion for sweating profusely brings you back to this air-conditioning-devoid beast. You have become alarmingly good at pretending to write essays while maintaining an intense focus on ordering food online within 15 minutes of arrival. You eat chips very loudly and routinely forget to turn your phone on silent. You have something between your teeth, but no one has told you yet.

Memorial Library

Even if you don’t know it yet, you are a criminal in the making and are practicing for long days in prison by holding yourself up in the campus jail — it’s no wonder stabbings don’t phase you.

Axe in the stacks: The story behind Memorial Library’s haunting attack

Despite your shortcomings, you are a more serious student than your College Library bound counterparts and not only responsible enough to know where your Wiscard is, but also remember to bring it with you.

You love The All American Rejects. You do not need light. You do not need coffee, or even water. You thrive at 60-degrees Fahrenheit. You are a common houseplant, Dracaena.

Starbucks

You have no interest in studying in large groups, and find it easy to avoid social contact by parking yourself at Starbucks to ensure there wouldn’t possibly be enough table space in case a friend wanted to join.

You have the “Your Favorite Coffeehouse” playlist saved to Spotify and at least three different Buzzfeed tabs open. Chipotle remains on the fringes of your mind no matter how often you remind yourself of the 410 calories in your mocha frappuccino. You probably have yet to take your ethnic studies course. You are exactly 6 feet tall.

Student Activity Center

You knew you chose the right college when you realized you could mask picking up free condoms by studying at a table right outside the Sex Out Loud office.

Lost in nostalgia for your freshman year, you gaze through the SAC windows into the vast ceiling-to-floor windows at Gordon and daydream of better days. You are going to be the type of adult who drinks a glass of warm milk before bed.

Wisconsin Historical Society

You will accept defeat and study with friends as long as you have a surefire guarantee they won’t speak to you, breathe on you or look at you.

During high school college tours, you were by far the most excited prospective student when the tour guide at every college in America insisted that Hogwarts was based on their campus library. You’ve snapchatted the green lamps with the caption “study break ” countless times.

Your affinity for the Historical Society lies in the fact that you are free to ponder the past, while exam review guides on your desk remind you that you have no future. You are vitamin B12 deficient.

Memorial Union

The constant hum of construction keeps you grounded, pulling you back to warm memories of your Midwestern childhood. You’d rather not pack a lunch, so in between classes you settle for paying three times the appropriate price for a hummus wrap and camping out at a quiet booth in the union.

It’s been a couple weeks since you last called your grandparents — make sure to do that soon. You don’t know how to pronounce açaí.

Bascom Hill

You either don’t sunburn, or don’t care. You are also not studying anything except the texture of blades of grass and the back of your hand.

The glare of the sun on the white pages of your textbook or computer screen not only seriously impairs your vision, but squinting your eyes is halfway to shutting them — plus you’re already horizontal. Pretending to study would be exerting too much energy, so you never even start.

You steal your friends’ Netflix passwords and are always late to pay your roommates your share of this month’s gas bill. You love French toast.