It’s every Badger’s favorite bedtime story.
After all, who hasn’t fantasized about flinging themselves across a University Avenue intersection right as the 80 bus comes rattling around the corner for the sake of free tuition?
Stomp the brakes and brace for some bad news.
Legend has it any student scraped by a bus will receive their tuition back in full as compensation from the university. They then can attend classes at no cost for the rest of the year.
But getting hit by a campus bus offers nothing but a bruised abdomen, lengthy paperwork at the University of Wisconsin Hospital emergency room and perhaps a broken leg or two.
“It’s not quite as [students] describe it, but there is a provision to assist students who experience a major life situation,” John Lucas, a UW spokesperson, said.
This provision is known as the Compassionate Refund Policy, and applies only to students who suffer a life-threatening incident, which necessitates their withdrawal from the university.
In the event a student is hit by a bus, or any other vehicle really, they can get “free tuition” if the injury is so dire that they can no longer attend classes at all.
The ‘Nail’s Tales’ sculpture is leaving. Here’s what I want to replace it.
In that case, students would get a refund for some percentage of their tuition. After the first four weeks of class though, that refund goes down — 30 percent at best, 10 percent at worst.
“Cases are reviewed on a case by case basis,” Lucas said.
Basically, I wouldn’t recommend intentionally going face-to-face with the nose of a 20-ton city bus. If you’re staying at UW, you’re paying for UW.
Don’t fret, there are other ways to save money. There’s a Goodwill only a couple miles away. Download Hooked. Also, maybe catch a bus to a real life adult job. The possibilities are endless. On Wisconsin.
