The apocalypse has been on a lot of people’s minds recently. Though the end of the world is certainly a familiar topic often transformed and reexamined in various media, it seems that now more than ever the meme is enjoying its fair share of the spotlight. And it would be fair to say there are plenty of reasons for this. 2012, the exact pinpoint of the apocalypse according to certain Mayan eschatology, is rapidly approaching. Various unstable world leaders and terrorist sects around the globe are in pursuit of nuclear weapons. And, perhaps gravest of all, Brett Favre is poised to win a Super Bowl with the Vikings — doubtless the closest thing to the gnashing of teeth Packers fans have ever had to bear.

“Legion” offers its own exegesis of the revelation: archangel Michael (Paul Bettany, “The Young Victoria”) goes AWOL from the celestial army after God orders the destruction of mankind because He “got tired of all the bullshit.” Michael then spends the next 90 minutes defending pregnant teen Charlie (Adrianne Palicki, TV’s “Friday Night Lights”), whose out-of-wedlock child is ostensibly the only hope for humanity.

Charlie is joined by her stalwart boyfriend Jeep (Lucas Black, “Get Low”) and his Busch Light-pounding father (Dennis Quaid, “Pandorum”) who, along with a collection of other lost souls, fight off the insurrection at a small rest stop in the middle of the Mojave Desert.

To be clear, “Legion” is not exactly a theological treatise in the same vein as “The Passion of the Christ” or even “The Last Temptation of Christ” so much as it is an action shoot-’em-up over the backdrop of quasi-Christian eschatology. Its premise has some obvious inconsistencies, juggling various depictions of God from medieval and draconian to Hellenistically anthropomorphic to New Testament savior. But these discrepancies are not that bothersome and quite forgivable, considering the extreme unlikelihood that newly minted screenwriters Peter Schink and Scott Stewart had any designs on elucidating grand theological truths when they decided to reveal the wrath of God in the form of a foul-mouthed, vampiric old lady (you may remember her from the teaser spots).

All theological treatises aside, “Legion” fails most when it takes itself too seriously and tries to be the religious authority it decidedly is not. This occurs in varying degrees throughout the film, mostly in Michael’s descriptions of the goings-on in heaven and the military orders of the Big Man Upstairs.

For example, after a brief Mexican standoff, archangels Michael and Gabriel go at it in a final showdown of sorts, and we learn angels’ wings are apparently made of Kevlar after Michael’s M-16 is rendered useless. The action sequences are pretty intense, but they are often followed by contrived dialogue smelling of feigned seriousness and tongue-in-cheek irony. The relationship between Jeep and Charlie is also presented as a mild allegory of that of Joseph and Mary, which, again, doesn’t seem to fit with the rampant violence throughout the rest of the film.

But even these pitfalls, just like all of humankind, are almost redeemed by unexpected and borderline hilarious scenes. Some movies (“Dawn of the Dead,” “Snakes on a Plane”) can be appreciated for their absolute implausibility and the self-awareness that makes that implausibility so entertaining. “Legion” shows shades of that self-awareness, making the most of a lot of opportunities for prurient slapstick humor. For example, a one-handed short order cook uses a frying pan to wound the aforementioned old lady and Jeep even gives a resounding “Fuck you!” to the archangel Gabriel at the end of the second act.

Unfortunately, though, these absurd passages are few and far between, and the semi-serious tract of doomsday religiosity dominates “Legion.” The film tries to be more than it is, favoring the sublime over the ridiculous. But perhaps that’s the point. Maybe Schink and Stewart have constructed highly irrational religious narrative ? la L. Ron Hubbard to serve as some sort of underhanded agnostic manifesto.

Whatever their intentions may have been, one thing remains certain. If, at the time of this printing, we will be inundated with press coverage of Favre’s victory in the NFC championship game, then we are all surely one step closer to Armageddon.

1.5 stars out of 5.