If you have ever taken the three-hour trip east on I-90, into the Windy City and down West Addison St., you may have stumbled on a sunny little place known as "Wrigleyville." In this garden of Eden, the spirits run high, the days run long and the beer flows freely. In this happy corner of the world, the locals never work, and the sun always shines. In Wrigleyville, life is as God intended it to be.

Now before I proceed, I want you to know that this column is not intended to antagonize you, the Brewers' fan. Rather, I felt compelled to write this article because I generally care about you, and I want you to be a happier person. I want you to know that there is a great and powerful force in this world, radiating with love and eternal happiness, and that all of your dreams can come true, if you are only willing to learn "The Way of the Cub."

You see, The Way of the Cub is not simply a dogma for baseball fans on Chicago's north side. The Way of the Cub is in fact, a way of life, and it holds all the world's secrets and all the world's truths. The Way of the Cub can be applied to any aspect of your life and can provide you with eternal peace of mind.

At its very core, The Way of the Cub emphasizes a never-ending passion for the following stages in life, most accurately personified by the common mantra: "There's always next year."

The Way of the Cub also places a great deal of importance on taking hold of circumstances and truly creating the reality every baseball fan wishes to experience. Whether the Cubs are in first place or last, the faithful flood the mecca of the sporting world (Wrigley Field), fully aware that the success of their beloved team is measured in the ballpark's stands, not in the conference standings.

We sing together at every game, we laugh together at every Cardinals fan and we drink together at every occasion.

But we also believe in justice. If there is a blasphemous home run hit in our ballpark, we throw it back and the run(s) are taken off the scoreboard (at least in our minds). If a Cubs player or manager does not fully give himself to the team, we banish him like an angel cast to hell. And if a mindless onlooker just so happens to be in the stands of Game 6 of the National League Championship series and interferes with a clearly catchable foul ball down the left field line costing the Cubs the game and the series, we ostracize him as if he contained the most deadly disease on earth.

Most importantly however, The Way of the Cub teaches us that there is an even greater happiness that awaits the faithful. In 1945, William "Billy Goat" Sianis told us that a Great Winning Drought would descend upon our people to test the truly faithful. The Greek tavern owner and his goat have become a symbol of the discipline and perseverance of Cubs fans and the hurdle for which we have yet to overcome.

But the day of glory is rapidly approaching, and wise sports prophets from across the country have predicted that this is our year. A World Series is only weeks away, and the time has never been better for you to see the light.

I don't want you to take my word for it, however. I want you to try for yourself. Go ahead, don the bright blue Cubs hat on Monday. Feel the power of love and happiness radiating from the glowing red "C" down throughout your body. Notice how your food tastes better, how women are suddenly friendlier and how the troubles of the world wash away with just a sip of ice cold "Old Style."

You and I live in troubling times, in a very troubled land. Everywhere you look in Brewers Nation there are pitchers falling out of the starting rotation, minor leaguers inexplicably not being called up and worst yet, fans staying home instead of going to the game. But right down the road, there are 40,000 fans singing "Take Me Out to the Ballgame," cheering on a first-place team and loving life no matter what the outcome of the season. It is a beautiful thing. It is "The Way of the Cub."

Brewers fans and heathens alike, I hope I have done my part in showing you the light. In the end, all I want you to know is: There is a better way.

Andy Granias is the Editorial Page Editor and can be reached at [email protected].