Michael Poppy
This week's topic was a tough one to decide upon. I threw poker, competitive eating, dominoes, And 1 Streetball and anything involving a Frisbee in a hat to pick.
The result: And 1 Streetball! Wow, picking names out of a hat was an even better sport than that.
Now don't get me wrong, I love basketball and even the street game, but And 1 represents none of it.
Once upon a time it was cool — back with Rafer "Skip To My Lou" Alston pushing the mix tapes with his killer moves — but once it got its own show and went mainstream, it was done for.
I mean the show has become so boring — the guys don't even do anything basketball-related. Every move they try to do is some sort of combination of a travel, carry, double dribble or any other violation. Then all the guys do is complain about how they're not in the NBA. Duh! It's obvious why they're not: They can't play by any rules whatsoever!
Plus they don't even follow the rules for adding new players on their so-called tour — they just add and kick them off as they please, like when a couple of them get into a fight about passing the ball. If that's what people really want to see, just tune in to the New York Knicks and "Starbury" for about a week or two.
The worst part about And 1 Streetball, however, is the annoying DJ — if you can even call him that — on the court attempting to do play-by-play, if you can even call it that. All the guy does is shout players' names ("A-OOO!") and dance around like Napoleon Dynamite. That's what an announcer and half-time entertainment is for, buddy.
Maybe if the mix tape tour would bring back Escalade, I'd be more sold on it, but for now And 1 Streetball earns the title of worst sport ever.
Dave McGrath
Somewhere on the planet there should be a pantheon of the world's worst sports.
Included would have to be shrines for televised poker, Chinese checkers, whale rodeo and whatever sport Richard Simmons is playing at the time.
But without a doubt the worst sport ever invented would have to be race walking.
The sport of race walking is exactly what it sounds like. It's a race — but you can't run.
A race walker has to keep at least one foot on the ground at all times. If at any point he doesn't: game over.
First off, many race walkers win the same way many NASCAR races are won — in the pit stops. The problem is that in race walking there really aren't any pit stops built into the race. Should a racer have to use the bathroom at some point during the race, they just have to let it go. For some reason, stomach cramps tend to be common for race walkers, so things, as you imagine, can get pretty messy for these 50-kilometer races.
Plus, who would want to dedicate their lives to walking, anyway? Does any kid grow up with a race walking poster on their wall? If they do, they probably get beat up all the time.
If you ever saw a race walk you would probably think you'd stumbled onto a bunch of crazed power walkers — and you'd be right. Heel-to-toe, heel-to-toe, that is the race walker anthem. Much like power walkers you might see on the street and bike paths, these guys are ridiculed more than the aforementioned Mr. Simmons. The only thing is that they are actually even more deserving.