Created as a day to celebrate love and perhaps bolster the greeting card and candy industries along the way, recently Valentine’s Day appears to have morphed into an all-out war with single people on one side and those in relationships squarely on the other. For years, people on both sides of this divide have criticized the seemingly exclusionary nature of the holiday and the pressures that come with a day dedicated to the expression of love. While perceived as more geared toward the romantic, the type of love you celebrate on Feb. 14 is up to you. There is no need for the single-relationship divide or for Valentine’s Day to be anything other than smooth sailing. I’m here to tell you that celebrating Valentine’s Day can be fun regardless of what your relationship status is.
The reasons as to why single people tend to resent Valentine’s Day are obvious. Sometimes sarcastically referred to as “Singles Awareness Day,” the day seems geared solely toward those in romantic pairs and therefore rubbing salt into a single relationship status. There has been a recent movement deemed “Anti-Valentine’s Day” in which single people go out and party together Feb 14. This is all fine and good; however, there is no need for a distinct movement to celebrate non-romantic love, as Valentine’s Day serves a dual purpose — celebrating the romantic as well as the friendly love. In several other countries, Valentine’s Day is a day to celebrate friends as well as your significant other. For example, in many Latin American countries, the Valentine’s Day equivalent is known as “The Day of Love and Friendship” in which much of the day’s activities are focused on romance but also on celebrating friendship.
For those that choose to bemoan their single status come Valentine’s Day, the reality is simple. Of course Valentine’s Day is going to suck if you wallow in single pity – any day that you do so is guaranteed to suck. Instead of watching The Notebook and wishing for a shirtless Ryan Gosling to appear at your door, go out dancing with your friends and enjoy the perks that the single life brings or merely treat it as another day. In short, when you are single on Valentine’s Day, it only sucks if you let it suck.
While Valentine’s Day may seem to be a walk in the park for those that are in relationships, those who are romantically involved can also feel pressure on Valentine’s Day. With the bombardment of “romance, romance, romance” by advertisers, the pressure to perform is on — often at a large monetary cost. According to the National Retail Federation, consumers are expected to spend a total of $17.3 billion on their significant other for Valentine’s Day in 2014 — averaging out to $133.91 per person. Often the actual celebration of love can get lost in a commercial firestorm of anxiety over gifts and plans. In addition, there has been a strong backlash against romantic pairs celebrating the holiday at all, claiming that doing so is somehow a betrayal to their single friends.
Valentine’s Day has evolved into a holiday that seems to be more about exclusion and alienation than about celebrating love. Do not feed into the hysteria or believe the hype. Valentine’s Day remains a day to celebrate love and love can be found regardless of one’s relationship status as long as you let it. Make the day about romantic and friendly love. Unnecessary stress over the day of love can be found on both sides of the single-relationship divide. Single people can spend the day partying with friends, celebrating a different facet of love in their lives and those in relationships should not feel pressure to live up to the exorbitant commercialization that Valentine’s Day brings. Let’s end the war between singles and couples and have a good Valentine’s Day.
Madeline Sweitzer ([email protected]) is a freshman majoring in political science and intending to major in journalism.
