When it comes to outsiders speculating about sexuality in the Greek community, the claim, "You think you know, but you have no idea," is actually far from the truth. Actually, we are quite similar. Of course, we have our rituals, ceremonies and other secretive aspects of our chapters that are only explained to members, but as far as sexuality is concerned — we are not so different from non-Greek students at the University of Wisconsin.
But before I enlighten you with all the similarities, let me first address a large difference: labels. Sexually promiscuous students without a Greek affiliation are typically referred to with generic names. For females, they may be called a slut or a whore. For males, it's something similar.
As a Greek, however, we are bestowed even more stirring and derogatory titles, many of which are used before it's even known if the Greek in question does, in fact, sleep around. I've heard them all: sorostitutes and fratdaddies, hambones and hooknasties, or simply slutty sorority girl — oh, the alliteration! And because I can't pick my favorite adjective for "frat" guy, circle your favorite: chauvinistic, misogynistic, sexist. Furthermore, all of these references can be lumped into our own little sexually promiscuous worlds: the fratmosphere and the sororizone.
That large difference aside, let's discuss a huge similarity. We're all in college. Though some abstain, let's face it: There's a whole lotta sex going on around here. Whether it's the couple stumbling out of a bar — or, more shamefully, Taco Bell — to head home for a drunk roll in the sack, the two young people who couldn't wait until the football game ended and resorted to the Camp Randall restroom to relieve their sexual tension, or the "friends" from high school dressed as Tetris blocks on Halloween that decide even though their costumes aren't meant to fit together, they should still "make it work" in the bedroom. Whether the couple has been dating for years, just met or knows each other through a student organization, be it Greek or not, college students having sex is a common denominator.
Of course, I have to admit that it's easy to pick Greeks out from a crowd. From my experience, sorority women often travel in packs, fraternity men tend to frequent the same bars and we all feel the need to theme our parties, wear our letters and create matching T-shirts whenever possible. However, we have more than 2,500 members. To generalize and stereotype every single member regarding topics like sexuality is an absurd notion. As is the case with any student organization, there's always "that guy" or "that girl." In our case, "that news story," or "that new TV show," which makes people believe that because one member of the organization does it, everyone does it. This is a false assumption.
As you may know, the media often portrays Greeks as heterosexual and homophobic. For example, if you watched "Greek" on ABC Family (Don't worry, I won't judge you… I watched it, too) there was a telling example when a young fraternity man struggled with whether or not he should come out to his brothers. Newsflash, my friends, that is another stereotype — all chapters aren't so judgmental!
Although I cannot speak for other campuses, the Greek community at UW is especially accepting of all sexualities. There are openly homosexual members in many chapters, and one of our recently founded fraternities, Delta Lambda Phi, is a progressive men's fraternity that has been widely accepted and encouraged to succeed by the greater Greek community.
Additionally, all new Greek members must go through a day of training with the campus organization Promoting Awareness Victim Empowerment and motivational speaker Rick Barnes, to learn about the dangers of sexual assault and other important issues.
We plan numerous educational speakers on topics like Harlan Cohen's "How to Find a Date while Sober," Leslie Goldman's "Body Image: The Naked Truth" and Sex Signals, "a two-person show that provides a proactive look at the issues of dating, sex and ultimately, acquaintance-rape on college campuses," according to Catharsis Productions.
A group of Greeks founded the Langdon Street Neighborhood Watch program, which utilizes the size of the Greek community to our advantage and sends crews of Greeks out on Friday and Saturday nights with reflective vests and flashlights to walk the Langdon area and serve as a visual deterrent without being confrontational. Many chapters schedule events for their members with Sex Out Loud and PAVE so that individual chapters can have one-on-one time with those facilitators and learn more in-depth about sex and safety.
Men participate in the Fraternity Action Coalition, which, according to University Health Services' definition, is "a one-credit independent study option for men in fraternities to learn from one another (and from victim services professionals) about the intersections of masculinity and violence against women."
I could go on until I'm blue in the face about all the things the Greek community does to battle our sexuality stereotypes, but I'll spare you that rant. What I want to say is that stereotypes, especially those about the Greek community, are merely generalizations fueled by entertainment and news media. Though there are stories, books and papers written about awful things that happen when Greeks are to blame, compare that to our track record at UW, and I'd say we've done pretty well. And, though it may be crazy for me to ask you to consider this: Greek or not, we're all Wisconsin Badgers (insert cheesy music here).
Mollie Shambeau ([email protected]) is a senior majoring in family and consumer journalism and retailing. She is also vice president of public relations and communications for the UW-Madison Panhellenic Association.
