With incredible attention paid to the Democratic frontrunners, you've probably forgotten that there's another party that will be featured in next year's election. However, the Grand Old Party would not have you forget that it plans on fielding a diverse array of accomplished candidates. The Republican field may even include former Wisconsin governor and Bush administration Health and Human Services secretary Tommy "The Long Shot" Thompson. He's the quintessential long-shot candidate, the underdog, the VCU to John McCain's Duke. He's former Wisconsin Gov. Tommy Thompson. And he's got it all wrong.
By now you, the inquisitive reader that you are, must be asking what Tommy's chances are. I answer your question with a question. Did you have a crush on a supermodel, or want to start in the NBA, even though you're only 5-foot-5? Ever had a dream that you could never achieve? Well, Wisconsin's own Tommy Thompson is crushing all up on a supermodel, and she's not digging him. That supermodel is the Republican presidential nomination.
It could be said that Tommy's got an in where other presidents don't. With an aging population and the tendency of middle-aged and senior citizens to arrive in larger numbers at polling places, perhaps 2008 will prove to be the year of the health-care president. Perhaps America's aging population is fixated on its health care and Tommy's past as a champion of health-care coverage will swing middling to senior-aged Republican voters into his camp. That seems to be what Tommy is betting on, as his résumé and accomplishments boast little besides his able handling of Wisconsin's health-care system and subsequently America's health care.
Want one phrase to sum up a candidacy based on America's concern for its health-care system?
Not a chance.
A number of you were hoping I'd go with "buck nasty," but this situation hardly calls for it.
See, Tommy's got it all wrong. Americans don't get excited about health-care presidents anymore. That's like a college student getting excited about a professor rumored to be well-versed in the art of legible chalkboard writing. Good stuff, legible chalkboard writing, but hardly conducive to an attentive classroom of sleep-deprived college types.
What America wants is a sexy, well-known, recognizable type, preferably one who has a lot to say on the issue of the day: the Iraq blunder.
A candidate like Sen. Barack Obama, D-Ill., or even Sen. Russ Feingold, D-Wis., is attractive for his prescient distrust of, or present unwillingness for, the Iraq war. Sen. John McCain, D-Ariz., is enticing voters by setting himself up as a sort of behind-the-lines do-gooder, a Republican Senator hoodwinked into compliance over President Bush's war in Iraq now standing up to the administration's decadent misbehaviors.
And Tommy Thompson? He was a compliant member of President Bush's cabinet. Hardly the association an underdog is looking for.
What the aging Sen. McCain and charismatic Sen. Obama realize is that Americans are thoroughly concerned with our current venture in Iraq — and with good reason. Hundreds of billions of dollars to subsidize what many are calling a failed and damaging misadventure say Americans are rather justified in their earnest concern.
Meanwhile, Tommy's still counting on Americans being worried about affordable and accessible health care. According to a CBS News/New York Times open-ended poll conducted March 7-11, Americans are more concerned about Iraq than they are about health care. Twenty-nine percent of responders felt Iraq was the most pressing concern facing America today, while 8 percent felt it was health care. Make no mistake, this election is about health care as much as March is about the NIT. This election is about Iraq, and March is about the NCAA tournament.
If I have thoroughly dashed your hopes of a future cheesehead president, don't lose hope just yet. Tommy's trying his best to construct a respectable solution for Iraq. However, his framework, based on dividing Iraq into three distinct entities — one for Sunnis, one for Kurds and one for Shiites — is a bit too indicative of failure. Leaving a divided Iraq when Saddam managed to keep it together is a blow to the American psyche we may not be ready to take. Or maybe the doom and gloom of Iraq has left us willing to settle for Thompson's plan.
Wisconsin's best hope at a cheesehead president in this election simply lacks the name recognition, media attention and reliable platform to garner much Republican support. Frontrunners like Sen. McCain and former New York Mayor Rudy Giuliani can point to their stances and reactions to 9/11 and Iraq as solid examples of their ability to lead during times of war.
And Tommy Thompson? Well, he's got your health care on lockdown. But that's just not good enough for America anymore.
Gerald Cox ([email protected]) is a junior majoring in economics and Middle Eastern Studies.
