A lesson out of the first few pages of the American political playbook: when citizens are angry about a range of policies, blame the media. It is an effective, time-tested method to stop the bleeding.

When outgoing White House press secretary Scott McClellan was unable to tell us what, if anything, went wrong during Hurricane Katrina, he accused the press of ignoring those in need. When asked whether the White House would answer questions about the vice president's shooting incident, Mr. McClellan accused the press of showing off for the cameras.

For all the grief media gets, we have a difficult task in sorting the newsworthy from the trivial. How relevant is a car bombing in Iraq compared to the opening of a new water treatment plant? How do you cover ongoing legal proceedings in a way in which the speculation does not become laughable?

Anyone who has shared my misfortune in viewing cable news the past few weeks knows what I mean. In the ceaseless race for updates or new insights in the Duke lacrosse rape scandal, anchors have literally been forced to apologize for an entire program of baseless speculation in advance.

Over the past few weeks the outlets have decided to barrage us with the daily MySpace.com horror story, inevitably accompanied by a panel of fresh-faced teenagers recounting stories of the shirtless 51-year-old guy who added them as a friend and offered them a web cam. Strangely, popular media didn't think the site's popularity was “booming” until Rupert Murdock's “News” Corporation bought it. A coincidence, I am sure.

If ever a better metaphor for media subjectivity existed than the annual Badger Herald/Daily Cardinal softball game, I'd like to hear it. Either each newspaper staff was unforgivably drunk after the showdown or our allegiances gave us remarkably different perceptions of this game of slow pitch.

Friends of mine from the opposing paper accused the Herald of instructing women not to swing and refusing to let women bat. This is a baseless charge, as our value for women was put on full display in this year's "Herald Hotties" calendar. (There are some pretty hard-hitting interviews in there.) When recounting the game, legitimate line drives by yours truly were unfairly characterized as “bleeders,” while puny fly-outs to third base by the opposition were nearly home runs.

Finally, with the Herald down and the winning run on the plate in the final inning, a controversial strike call ended the game. My metaphor would be valid if the Herald and Cardinal were watching the same thing. Of course, it was the same game of softball, but we watched it from different sides of home plate.

Good media is able to sift through opposing perceptions of an event to give the reader a cogent version of a story, while shoddy media regurgitates opposing viewpoints. While this may seem counterintuitive to some, it is the responsibility of the press to do more than narrate. They must also act as a trusted investigator for the readers they serve. An effective umpire does not explain to the crowd why one team saw a strike and the other a ball. Consumers of news should not be forced to decide which argument contains the most emotionally appealing rhetoric in order to make sense of an issue.

Good media can also indiscriminately identify the un-newsworthy. Myspace, Facebook, the Natalee Holloway Aruba mystery (see: Rita Cosby in post-Katrina New Orleans proudly proclaiming: We're coming back for you next week, Natalee!), the Duke lacrosse incident and whether Katie Holmes will scream during birth do not merit hours of coverage simply because everyone else decided they are our nation's most noteworthy events. Good media does not ignore the subjectivity nearly every source brings to a story, nor does it ignore the motives of forces who wish to invent a story.

In conclusion, the softball game and my impressive statistics merit news coverage this week and the Daily Cardinal staff is a 2,000-strong gang of unscrupulous cheaters. Further, you can obtain the "Herald Hotties" calender — complete with remarkable in-depth interviews with the queens of modern journalism — at my MySpace profile. Which, by the way, is also newsworthy.

Bassey Etim ([email protected]) is a junior majoring in political science and journalism.