Let's say you've been in a committed relationship with the person you love for 30 years. You've bought a house, paid off loans, raised a family, taken vacations and grown old with this person. You've forged a lasting bond based on mutual love and respect.

Sound like anyone you know? I could have been describing my parents, the neighbors down the street, the pastor at my local church or many other loving couples around the state of Wisconsin. I could have been talking about Carol and Virginia from Eau Claire. The only difference with Carol and Virginia is that they don't have an automatic right to make health care decisions for each other, to visit each other in the hospital, to file joint tax returns, to donate each other's organs after death, to take bereavement leave if the other dies, to be authorized drivers on each other's rental cars or even to deduct each other's medical expenses on their income tax returns. That's because Carol and Virginia are lesbians, and they aren't afforded any of the legal protections of a married couple.

Wednesday night at the Wisconsin Union Theater Evan Wolfson and Glenn Stanton squared off on the issue of gay marriage. It's sad that this debate is still going on in this state in 2005. Wisconsin, which has been a leader in passing laws to protect homosexuals from workplace and other discrimination, has failed to protect this same class of citizens when it comes to legal issues that affect the family. Not only have we failed to provide basic rights and responsibilities to real Wisconsin families, but we've also tried to make this denial permanent. Currently, members of our State Legislature have proposed an amendment to our constitution that would ban civil unions and marriage for gay and lesbian couples.

Our state Constitution was designed to protect people, not to hurt them. Article 1 reads, "All people are born equally free and independent, and have certain inherent rights: among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness." The proposed amendment abuses our Constitution and attempts to deny to certain people in Wisconsin one of our three recognized essential rights. It's simply wrong to codify such discrimination.

Which of the rights that I named earlier would you be willing to give up? Currently, married couples in Wisconsin are granted over 1,200 rights and responsibilities by both federal and state law. Marriage isn't just a privilege — it's also a responsibility. It's illegal to physically beat your spouse and the law carries special punishments for doing so. If Wisconsin voters approve the proposed amendment to ban civil unions and marriage, gay and lesbian couples, and any unmarried couples for that matter, will be denied this special protection.

Injustices occur daily, whether it's the couple who has been together for 29 years and can't see each other after one is hospitalized with heart problems, or the mother whose daughter has had an allergic reaction to a bee sting and has to race across town to get a note from her partner — the legally recognized mother — to take their child to the hospital. The proposed amendment to our State Constitution would permanently enshrine this kind of unequal treatment toward Wisconsin families at some of their most vulnerable moments.

But what the amendment also seeks to accomplish is another roadblock down the path of equal treatment for all Wisconsin citizens. People can't control whom they love. The state shouldn't limit who gets legally recognized rights and responsibilities based on who wants to make their love a lifelong, publicly recognized commitment.

Gay and lesbian couples have every right to marry. Marriage is a contract that provides legal safeguards to people who have made a lasting commitment to each other. Denying these rights is morally and ethically unjustifiable. The first step for our state in achieving the equality deserved by all is to reject the proposed amendment to the state constitution that would ban civil unions and gay marriage. After Wisconsinites make a strong stance that discrimination is wrong and unwelcome here, then we will be able to move on to press for true equality.

Elizabeth Sanger ([email protected]) is a junior majoring in literature.