Daroline Drowley, 19, of Madison, Wisconsin, passed away Wednesday, Oct. 5, 2022, at The Badger Herald office.
Daroline suffered from multiple causes of death, including but not limited to, extreme exhaustion, food poisoning and murder. Daroline died laughing at a joke made by Paudrey Phibert of The Badger Herald. Paudrey died soon after, laughing at Daroline laughing at her own joke.
A funeral celebration will be held Thursday, Oct. 6, 2022, in conjunction with Paudrey’s funeral celebration at Plaza Tavern. Visitation will be held until 10:00 p.m., with a reception to follow with free copies of Daroline’s “Herald Style Guide” for those who knew Daroline and free long islands for those who knew Paudrey.
Daroline was spawned Oct. 21, 2002. She was the gaffer of all gaffers, leading the Harold soccer team to two victories. Though small in number, the wins were big in meaning. Central to Daroline’s coaching approach was her three-step process, repeated before, during and after the matches.
The steps are as follows:
STEP 1: GET ON THE FIELD
STEP 2: SCORE SOME (LOTS OF) GOALS
STEP 3: FOOKIN’ WIN
Daroline’s hobbies included ghostwriting sports articles, spending time with her boyfriend Nahte and creating 12 PowerPoints per hour.
During her limited hours away from The Badger Herald office, Daroline spent her time at The Badger Herald office.
Scott McInerney remembers her fondly and reflects on her legacy.
“I will deeply miss the gaffer energy and spirit she brings to the Herald,” McInerney said. “There was never a dull moment when she was in the room.”
Daroline’s final regret was that she only unlocked 95% of her brain, not the full 100%.
Rest in peace, gaf.
