There is nothing more fun and relevant to college students than imagining what Big 10 schools would be according to certain themes. I couldn’t think of any theme that The Odyssey Online hadn’t already covered, so here are the Big 10 schools if they were articles by The Odyssey Online.
Chacos are just SO comfortable, just like how Purdue fits in the Big 10. Purdue you’re so cute, keep doing what you’re doing.
Fuck you Rutgers. You suck. Get out of our conference!
The Ohio State University
The Ohio State is so good at football, this is the only Odyssey Online article that would make sense. Going to a Big 10 school is so much fun as a football fan!
University of Michigan
Schmidt is SUCH a loveable douchebag that this article just HAS to be Michigan. Oh Michigan you jerks, we love you!
University of Illinois
Kimmy Schmidt is so bubbly, just like Illinois. This Odyssey article is SO Illinois because it’s so quirky and fun.
“Sorority chapter meetings as told by dogs”
Indiana is one of those schools that’s greek, but cool and fun at the same time, just like dogs. Dogs are also so cute and relatable, so this article has to be Indiana because they’re SO similar.
University of Minnesota
This article is heartfelt and emotional, just like Minnesota. Minnesota is famous for the nicest people, just like how The Odyssey is so emotional to Chacos.
Penn State University
Penn State is misunderstood, just like sororities. People need to change their ideas about feminine greek life and the answers are in this article. I can’t think of a better example to represent Penn State than this.
University of Nebraska-Lincoln
Nobody ever knows what’s going on in Nebraska, so this is an obvious fit. Like, why do they wear those corn hats? Or why are they so weird? These are some common questions we ask people from Nebraska.
University of Maryland
Maryland is an outsider to the Big 10, and it’s like they look at us as if we are from another world. They’re also super weird and we want nothing to do with them. Maryland is obviously this Odyssey article.
University of Wisconsin-Madison
Going to Madison is amazing. State Street is amazing, Langdon is amazing and literally everything about this school is spectacular. Wisconsin is clearly the best of all the Big 10 schools so this is why it’s a good fit for this Odyssey article.
University of Iowa
This article is clearly written by a Michigan State student, but it is more appropriate when relating it to Iowa. Iowa is only small towns and corn fields so the campus is basically a big city and this Odyssey article HAS to be Iowa.
Michigan State University
I don’t feel this way, but Michigan State students really do love their university. Keep having fun Michigan State students!
Northwestern is so proper and mean to the rest of the Big 10. They think they are so smart and cool because they are highly ranked. Northwestern, you don’t even go here.