Hump day: 28 tricks to spice up your sex life

Is sex with long-term partner becoming vanilla? Enhance boring intercourse with these tips ranging from mild to spicy

· Feb 25, 2015 Tweet

Photo courtesy of Flickr user al (rino) del vecchio

Sex. After being with the same person for a long time it can get boring.

Healthy sexual relationship needs some tender love and care. Monogamy doesn’t have to be monotonous.

Want to get out of a sexual rut? Here are 30 ways how:

  1. Speak up. Communication is always the best way to improve sex. Plus, researchers from Cleveland State University said people who discuss sex are more sexually satisfied — especially if they talk during sexy time. Too shy to speak up in the moment? Try using nonverbal cues during sex, such as moaning extra loud when something feels great. Heat: Mild 

  2. Sext. Make your special someone blush by sending erotic texts or snapchats. Being turned on in public by a partner is thrilling, and sexy plans can be made for later. Just make sure that the receiver is DTS (Down To Sext). Not into technology? Leave sexy notes in backpacks or pants pockets for your partner to find later. Heat: Medium
  3. Stand up for each other. Having sex standing up can throw a totally different dynamic into the mix. The receptive partner can either stand with their back against the wall (with insertive partner holding them up) or face the wall with palms pressed against it. Fresh angles can hit new sweet spots. For folks without the physical ability to do it standing up, try mimicking the effects of sex furniture by placing pillows underneath hips to experiment with different angles. Heat: Medium
  4. Slow it down. Try touching, thrusting and licking at half-speed. Each movement will become more intense, and when things speed up it will feel even more explosive. Use plenty of lube to avoid bad friction! Heat: Mild
  5. Shower together. Not only does it save water, showering together can also solve any smell problems. Feeling particularly daring? Try shaving each other’s naughty bits. Lotion each other up afterward, too. Heat: Mild
  6. Porn. Watching pornography together can get everyone hot and bothered, and can also introduce new activities into the mix. If you see something in pornography that you want to try, showing it to a partner is a great way to welcome discussion and even participation! Dying to get on camera yourself? Invite a partner to make a sexy amateur porno. Heat: Medium
  7. Massage. Midterm season is the perfect time to relieve a little stress by rubbing each other down with massage oil and loosening some of those knotted muscles. Use thumbs and the heel of the hand to knead, and pay special attention to shoulders and the neck. Even if it does not lead to sex, massaging is great for intimacy. Use massage oils (sweet almond oil is particularly good for rubbin’ each other down) or lotion. Just be sure to clean up before using condoms, since oil can degrade latex. Heat: Mild

    Photo courtesy of


  8. Sex travels. Bored of the bedroom? Find somewhere else to get it on! Plan a spring break camping trip full of tent sex or get down and dirty on the floor or stairs. Feeling sneaky during dinner? Steal away to a (single) bathroom for a quickie! Be wary of public spaces, however (that means no getting it on in the stacks unless you’ve somehow asked the consent of everyone in the library). Heat: Medium
  9. Masturbate together. Let’s be real: no one is better at getting you off then yourself. Mutual masturbation can teach partners what they know works. Plus, watching someone you’re in to get off is super hot. Heat: Medium
  10. Exercise restraint. If you’re into a little domination or submission, using handcuffs or ropes could hit the spot. Exploring control or lack thereof can totally revolutionize sex — just make sure to obtain informed consent, talk extensively about BDSM beforehand, do some research and exercise safety. Heat: Spicy
  11. Ice, ice, baby. Playing with temperature can add a whole new element to sex. Suck on an ice cube before kissing or going down on a partner. Grab an ice cube and see how fast you and your partner can melt it together — no hands allowed! Heat: Mild

    Photo courtesy of Reddit user mattbrunstetter


  12. Find the sour sweet spot. Use lemon or lime to dribble some juice on yourself or a partner. Then challenge them to find the spot or complete the task yourself. Heat: Mild
  13. Blindfold. When one sense is removed, the others are all heightened. Losing the ability to see can make even the most traditional sexual acts thrilling. Heat: Medium-Spicy
  14. Go shopping. Take a belated Valentine’s Day trip to shop for vibrators, lubricant, edible underwear, costumes or other sexy gifts. Heat: Medium
  15. Surprise them. Your lover has had a rough day at work and just texted to let you know they are on the way home. If you’re feeling frisky, greet them at the door in the nude. Of course, sexy surprises do not have to be this dramatic. Trying anything new in the bedroom can add a little pizzazz — even if that’s just lighting candles. Heat: Medium
  16. Don’t limit yourself to intercourse. Intercourse gets a lot of attention in the media, especially penis-in-vagina sex. Not only does this leave out non-heterosexual couples, it doesn’t give any credit to every other amazing sort of sex! Try pleasuring each other without penetration for a while, or increase foreplay. Expand your oral horizons with cunnilingus, anilingus and fellatio. Heat: Mild
  17. Use mirrors. Reflect on your sex life by using mirrors. Prop them up against walls, attach them to ceilings or even fool around on top of a mirror for an extra texture factor. Heat: Medium
  18. Get loud: Most Badgers have roommates, but this is a great option if everyone’s out for a few hours. There’s nothing more satisfying than letting go and yelling to your heart’s content. Heat: Mild
  19. Write erotic fiction together. This can become a game. Pass a notebook back and forth to create a story sentence by sentence or create a choose-your-own adventure to re-enact later. Heat: Medium

    Photo courtesy of

  20. Play dress-up. Whether it’s sexy lingerie, leather or a maid outfit, dressing up for gettin’ down can transform the mood. It can boost self-esteem and open up opportunities for fantasies and role-playing, which makes every encounter feel fresh. Heat: Medium-Spicy
  21. Morning Delight. Why not have a little sex with your morning coffee? Researchers suggest that having sex in the morning produces awesome health benefits such as an improved immune system and heightened energy. Plus it increases spontaneity, a much-needed ingredient in a sex life that needs revival. Heat: Mild
  22. New positions. Trying new positions could result in the discovery of fresh ways to stimulate one another. Even little changes (like putting legs on the insertive partner’s shoulders during missionary) can transform the moment. Write down positions on slips of paper to put in a jar and pick from at your leisure. Worried about flexibility? Search YouTube for yoga videos and do naked yoga together! Heat: Mild-Medium
  23. Bring in a third. Threesomes are a very popular fantasy. They can be really exciting, but require extensive discussion about boundaries beforehand. Heat: Spicy
  24. Smell you later. Out of all the senses, smell is the most closely associated with memory. Wearing a perfume or cologne specifically for sexy time can make your partner get hot and bothered just from catching a whiff. Heat: Mild
  25. Make bedroom rules. This can run the gamut from “no clothes allowed after 10 p.m.” to “no sex positions used twice in one week.” Heat: Medium-Spicy
  26. “Too Hot.” This game makes for great foreplay. The players kiss without touching each other. Whoever touches the other first loses, and the winner gets to do whatever they want to the loser (with their consent, of course)! Heat: Medium
  27. Give them a spanking. Use a flat palm on fleshy areas like the upper thighs or butt. Not only does this bring blood to the surface of the skin, therefore increasing sensitivity, but the sound can be erotic too! Pleasure and pain mix very nicely. Make sure to ask for explicit consent before you let loose on your loved one.
  28. Make a sexy playlist. Peruse Spotify together to make the perfect music sex playlist. Heat: Mild

This article was published Feb 25, 2015 at 6:00 am and last updated Feb 26, 2015 at 12:11 am


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