Peaceful protest smells of class warfare

By A.J. Hughes, Staff Columnist

Last week’s Earth Day would have probably gone unnoticed by most students, if not for the tire deflation pranks that took place in the Langdon neighborhood. The pranksters can probably claim success based on the attention their stunt received.

Devoting another column to the event certainly further pleases the pranksters. As the saying goes, any publicity is good publicity. This especially rings true with progressive activists who constantly whine about the lack of attention their causes get in the “corporate controlled media,” the Badger Herald included.

Despite this admission, the vandalism and response are impossible for me to resist. Last semester, I wrote a tongue-in-cheek column describing the progressive’s desire to legislate morality by asking the question, “What would Jesus do?” The column’s attempt at humor through juxtaposition failed based on its feedback from irate liberals claiming they had no religion and irate Christians claiming the piece was blasphemous.

If anyone thought there was an element of truth to my thesis linking activists to the Christian Coalition, last weeks’ Earth Day shenanigans proved them wrong. Jesus may not drive a sport utility vehicle, but he wouldn’t run around in early morning deflating SUV tires either, debunking my little theory.

Most students and community members have expressed disgust towards the SUV vandals, but not all. A few vocal vandal apologists have cropped up since last Tuesday’s senseless destruction. They come to the defense of the still anonymous earth firsters, noting that the deflation didn’t cause permanent damage.

The apologists continue that these folks living on Langdon really didn’t need those SUVs, so it really wasn’t that bad when a few rich kids from the east coast were a little late for class or had to pay a towing service to inflate their tires. They can always charge it to daddy.

Not so subtly implied in these defenses is the class disdain that exists on this campus. The stereotype exists that the Langdon neighborhood is full of Richie Rich types who pollute this university with their dress and their disregard for the progressive causes this campus once stood for.

The have-nots don’t appreciate the haves, nor do they appreciate their fancy cars. It is difficult for the self-proclaimed underprivileged to feel empathy for the perceived privilege that engulfs Langdon. It is easier to harbor jealousy (disguised as disgust) when a twenty-something almost runs you over in your Bikenstocks with their new Denali. Unfortunately, these attitudes will exist long after the tow truck inflates the victim’s tires.

But wherever your degree takes you, there will always be someone richer than you, and there will most likely be someone with a larger vehicle than you. Let’s hope by then you have learned that stealing your rival’s money and deflating their tires is not a productive response.

Switching gears entirely, the tire deflation incidents paint a poor picture for safety on our city streets. The Langdon neighborhood is notable as the city’s only student neighborhood with a full-time community police officer, yet an orchestrated and time-consuming vandalism effort took place under law enforcement’s nose.

It is naíve to believe that police can patrol student neighborhoods 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. At the same time, I am sure that Langdon residents would appreciate it if police abstained from writing another noise ordinance violation or underage drinking ticket until they find a promising lead in the SUV deflation cases. I am not holding my breath.

But as the campus reflects on the “Take back the night” vigil (a worthy event I hope you are reflecting on), let us keep an eye out for each other. The next time you see somebody acting suspiciously, call the police. If you don’t save a life, you may at least save a tire.

And if someone you know tries to apologize for the vandals, let them know it isn’t funny. Lest you end up paraphrasing Pastor Martin Niemoller: First they came for the drink specials, and I didn’t speak out because I didn’t drink. Then they came for the smokers, and I didn’t speak out because I didn’t smoke. Then they came for the SUV drivers, and I didn’t speak out because I didn’t drive. Then they came for me, and there was no one left to speak out for me.

A.J. Hughes ([email protected]) is a software developer and UW graduate.