Ladies and gentlemen,
exclusive societies are not only for uppity high school cliques and sororities.
It seems that Blair has found a bit of the Upper East Side across the park at
Columbia. She finds some sort of club whose members are beautiful, wealthy,
intelligent (yadda-yadda-yadda) and sport stylish membership keys around their
necks. And I thought we were past high school. Serena does not end up gaining
admission to this club, unlike her brunette sidekick, and Juliet spills to S
that Blair is to blame. 

While Blair is
hanging onto adolescent traditions, Chuck is enjoying showing his new girl old
New York. He even tells Lily all about his new lady, to which she suggests that
Eva accompany Chuck to Fashion’s Night Out along with the rest of our snotty
socialites. But while Eva is trying on a gown she could have never afforded
back in Europe (or out of the wallet of Chuck’s alias while residing there), B
makes an appearance and attacks Eva by saying that her dress may be couture,
but she is still “off the rack.”

At the event, quite
the cat-fight ensues, and we learn the shocking news that Serena’s lack of
admission into the society is on Juliet’s conscience. Lily just so happens to
be on the board of alumni, and grants Serena with a key as admission. Juliet’s
schemes become known, but something tells us she’s not leaving.

Of course, we all
know that Georgina’s baby isn’t Dan’s, but for some reason it’s taking these
characters a little longer to realize this. And Dan doesn’t seem to care,
because at this point, he has grown so attached to little Milo that he decides
to make him his own regardless of a true paternity test. Vanessa also offers to
move into Dan’s loft to assist caring for the child. Unexpectedly, Georgina
returns from her extended stay at the spa and blabs to Dan her long story about
why Milo isn’t hers and how Dan inadvertently saved her life. 

The episode closes
with a scene of Juliet visiting an inmate in jail. We don’t recognize his face,
but he’s clearly a large part of the story. A relatively slow episode, yeah,
but it seems like the season is really starting to heat up.

Oh yeah, and thanks
to Hot Chip and The Black Keys for making it a little easier to take this show
seriously.