For the NFL’s 32 franchises, making selections in the draft
is, at best, a crapshoot. Attempting to watch all 20 or so televised hours of
it at home isn’t much easier.
But, like a fourth-round pick that turns into a Pro Bowler,
there are plenty of rewards to be had for those who are fully prepared to watch
all two days of televised coverage this weekend.
And, just as it’s preparation that makes winners and losers
on draft weekend for the franchises handing out multi-million dollar contracts,
it is having a plan that separates a wasted spring weekend from a glorious one
for fans.
Consider the following information a scouting report on how
to succeed come Saturday.
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It’s a marathon, not a sprint.
As if the 10 (mercifully down from 15) minutes allotted for
picks in the first round wasn’t enough of an indicator, the draft goes at an
incredibly slow pace. If you get too excited, or gorge too much during the
first round, you’re never going to make it through the end of the first day, let
alone the seventh round.
Pacing yourself helps, and it’s a lot easier if you have
ways of entertaining yourself during the slow parts of the draft. Try guessing
the number of products Drew Rosenhaus puts in his hair or spotting the one fan
in the pro-Jets crowd gutsy enough to wear a Wes Welker jersey. It’s these
little time-killers that will get you through the four-and-a-half minutes
Pittsburgh takes to make its fifth-round selection.
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Keep your excitement in check. You will never hear from
half of these players again.
This certainly is more relevant to anything that happens on
the second day, but really applies to all the selections made during the draft.
There are more than 250 players who will have their name called this weekend
and the vast majority of them won’t be a factor on the field for a few years,
if ever.
So, while you might find yourself gushing over the receiver
with the 4.3 speed but suspect hands taken midway through the sixth round, it’s
important to understand that the next time you hear from him might be when he’s
running routes in the AFL. Or taking your order at McDonalds.
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No matter what you may think, Mel Kiper Jr. knows more
than you do.
It is Kiper’s job to know things like the number of lefty
punters from the Big 12 available in the draft, and he spends an inordinate
amount of time preparing for it. While you watch Scrubs nine times a day, he’s
watching tape, tape and more tape.
As such, don’t even pretend to know as much as he does.
Sure, he makes mistakes every now and then, but it’s never because of a lack of
preparation.
If you were planning to spend your weekend making outlandish
predictions to your friends (Felix Jones is the best back in the draft!) and
disagreeing with the actual experts (not the guys on whatever fly-by-night blog
you read), it is only going to make you look like an ass. Just sit back and
accept Kiper’s analysis as more accurate than yours.
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Keep your cell phone handy.
NFL teams spend half of their drafts working the phones.
Calling other teams with trade offers, calling in their picks, calling the
players they drafted… the telephone is what makes the draft run.
You too should be ready to make phone calls at a moment’s
notice. Minnesota doesn’t get their pick off in time? Text your friend in St.
Paul. Chicago doesn’t draft a quarterback? Give a ring to your friend that
thinks Rex Grossman is the devil. Communication during the draft is key. Plus,
you never know when someone in your favorite team’s war room is going to want
your input, or to let you know you’ve been drafted.
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Find one player to love unabashedly for the rest of his
career.
It’s always nice to follow someone’s career from start to
finish, and this weekend will be the start of many new careers. You can’t pick
a winner every year (where did you go, P.K. Sam?), but every once in a while a
late pick that you made “your guy” comes through for you, and it’s a
pretty rewarding experience. Just avoid picking someone who’s more likely to
have his name pop up in a police report than a highlight reel.
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Remote controls exist for a reason. Use them.
Even the most diehard fan will struggle to make it through
the entire draft, especially because it means seeing the same three or four
Under Armour commercials several dozen times. In order to stay fresh, it is important
to take quick breaks, and not just to go to the bathroom or the fridge.
I’d suggest flipping over to the NBA Playoffs during
commercials. Nobody’s going to judge you for not watching commercials. Just
don’t let yourself get distracted for too long.
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Take notes, but only in your head.
If you’re going to forget everything you hear and learn
during the draft, you might as well not watch it. By retaining the information
presented this weekend, though, you can have a leg up on the competition in
your fantasy draft or in spontaneous sports trivia battles. That doesn’t mean
you should write everything down, however.
Watching the draft is supposed to be enjoyable; it’s not
homework. Put the pens and paper away and give your memory some exercise.
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Lastly, remember the NFL Draft comes just once a year.
You might be pressured to go outside or turn off the
television. Some people may tell you that watching the whole draft isn’t
healthy, or normal. And, while they may be right, this isn’t something you do
every weekend, so go all out.
Ignore the naysayers. Use the above cheat sheet. Soak in
Chris Berman’s excitement and get yourself psyched up for the 2008 season.
There will be plenty of sunny weekends to spend outdoors, so
go ahead and devote this one to the football.
Like the draft teaches us every year, the bigger the risk,
the bigger the reward.
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Mike is a sophomore majoring in political science. If
you’d like to know his 40-yard dash time he can be reached at [email protected]
