Imagine if 5.1 percent of the American public showed up for a presidential election. Would you accept the results? Well, as you may be unaware, 95 percent of you missed an election last week. But don’t worry. It was probably the most unimportant election you’ll ever miss. Even as far as Associated Students of Madison elections go, last week’s freshman election was about as important to this university as I would have been to our football team. (This season, however, they could use all the help they can get.)

The turnout for this election was pathetic, though largely expected. And it truly doesn’t matter. The next one, however, with that newfangled constitution of yours, will. If at least 10 percent of the student body doesn’t vote on it, tear it up and start over. In the meantime, let’s see if we can’t get one out of 10 people to care enough to show up.

Look, let’s be realistic. About two of you are still reading this column. Words like “ASM” and “student government” draw and hold about as much attention with students on this campus as an AARP-sponsored curling tournament. The abject and well-documented apathy on our part as students to our student government is especially stark when juxtaposed with our fervor for the presidential campaign. If you haven’t been asked to register to vote yet, you may not exist. But how many times have you had someone encourage you to vote in an ASM election?

In case you missed it, Barack Obama will be here on Thursday. Rumor has it he’ll be on the Capitol Square. The last time a Democratic presidential nominee was on Madison’s Capitol Square — back in 2004 when John Kerry came to town — some 80,000 people showed up to see him, and many of them were students. The last time ASM had an election, 5.1 percent of the student body showed up.

By now, my vastly dwindling audience is pointing out that a comparison between an ASM freshman election and the election of the most powerful man on Earth is unfair. Yep. But ASM could tell you life is unfair. As ASM Chair Brittany Wiegand wrote recently in The Badger Herald opinion section, ASM committee chairs often put in enough hours to be considered to be working a part-time job. Yet, their stipends amount to less than minimum wage. That’s unfair, they’ll argue; pay them adequately. The response from the numerous ASM critics: you guys do nothing, so we might as well pay you nothing.

When I was a representative on the Student Services Finance Committee, I was impressed by the amount of time and work we as a committee and individuals put into serving on the committee. It’s not easy work. While I can’t speak for the entirety of ASM, if the work we did in SSFC is at all indicative of what it’s like serving on other parts of ASM, adequate pay is not asking too much.

I, and apparently many still involved with ASM, believe that part of making student involvement in ASM more robust is by making positions within the organization more attractive. Hence, the presidential position should be considered. Who doesn’t want to be elected president of anything? After all, isn’t that one of the underlying reasons why modern presidential elections are so followed? It’s the ultimate popularity contest. The idea of financial compensation for one’s time is also important in attracting and retaining representatives and chairs.

So, I’m all for ASM’s efforts at making their positions more attractive. But in the end, the only way to get more than 5 percent of the population interested in the next election — one that will actually matter — will need more than themed elections and pictures of Superman. It will need a legacy that speaks to effective governing. It won’t take a more effective press office; it will take real accomplishments for that press office to speak to.

Increasing turnout will take more than an Elections Committee that posts cute flyers. ASM would do well to watch closely what groups like the College Democrats do on and around Election Day. The voter turnout efforts engineered by such groups are impressive and effective. Watch and learn them, ASM. Better yet, talk to the respective executive boards of these groups in preparation for the next ASM election. Trust me, you guys need the help.

But most of all, it takes more than the bells and whistles that are offered every year by ASM to get students interested. The key to voter turnout is getting people to care. It’s doing things that actually matter.

And I’m just not convinced that they do.