In the few moments before sex, you get hot, tingling and lightheaded with anticipation. The juices are flowing, and your sense of touch is heightened. What we are not talking about is pain, physical pain that also occurs during intercourse as well. We’re not about emotional pain or pain that is intentional, that’s for another day. This physical pain can come in many forms, depending on the position, location, and um … lubrication. Unless you’re a masochist, these are only minor annoyances, but they do happen.

There are endless positions in which you can have sex, but with each position comes its own set of painful problems. Missionary, the old standard and all-round reliable position is pretty rough on the guys. They have the most amount of work to do, which also means that they are going to feel the burn quite a bit more. I’m sure the men reading this can relate to the burning sensation that slowly heats up in your biceps and shoulders and eventually settles in your lower back. Not to mention your abs really start to hurt after about half hour straight of gyrations. Even those of you who don’t have a clue what I’m addressing can at least relate to the nasty rug burn.

Bend me over doggie style can be pretty rough on the ladies for a number of reasons. Women tend to not have great upper body strength, which can be a problem when holding ourselves up. Although this position is a favorite among many gals, some find it very painful at the incorrect angle. In the heat of the moment men can think that a vagina is a never-ending cavity. Guys, please be sensitive to our cervix. Ouch! Thrusting too deep, especially in this position, is down right uncomfortable. Be responsive to her: if she is pulling away or stiffening up, this may be a sign that what you are doing is not pleasurable.

Where you have sex can be cause of more pain than the position. If you’re a virgin to the backseat of the car, listen up. Cars are not beds, they are cramped small places unaccommodating to humping. Banging your head on the window in a rhythmic manner will leave you with a shiner. If that’s not enough, try the Charlie horse in your calf muscle. You don’t have to be outside to get banged up. Doing it on any hard surface will leave the person lying down with soreness on the back, and carpet will leave harsh rug burn on your knees.

The shower is both a potentially dangerous place to have sex and one that can be bad for friction. Yes, the shower is a hot spot for loving but beware: when getting lusty make sure your footing is safely secure. A trip to the emergency room is bad for the mood. Guys, it is also important if you are going to hold her up, her legs around your waist, that you don’t do this when alcohol is involved. The potential for dropping her while still inside her is great. BPS, broken penis syndrome, is also not good for the mood. By all means have fun in the shower, hot tub or wherever there’s water, just use common sense.

This brings me to a very important point on lubrication and pace. It is very important for the girl to be fully aroused and wet before intercourse. Most of you will already know this and be able to identify. Women can get very sore and sensitive when there is not enough lubrication. Small tears in the skin can cause serious discomfort after sex and during urination.

Like the penis, the clitoris contains a bundle of nerves and enlarges while aroused. But unlike the penis, the clit can become hypersensitive to touch after enough rubbing and contact. Too much direct contact can over-stimulate the clit. This varies from lady to lady, but keep in mind a light touch can send us good vibrations.

The pace at which you thrust, girl or guy, can cause the other pain. When a girl is on top and leans back too far she is bending the penis and can cause pain to her guy. As could his penis coming out mid thrust and sitting on it bent. For the guys, I think Jack Black sang it well, “You don’t always have to fuck her hard, in fact sometimes that’s not right to do…” This may not even be just a pain issue; sometimes just grinding fast really doesn’t do much for the girl.

Depending on the position and location you choose, sex can feel amazing or it can feel incredibly uncomfortable. In the end, the good and pleasurable sensations still outweigh the bumps and bruises. Be responsive to each other’s body language. Tear it up or take it slow, either way make sure it’s feeling good for the both of you.