Sex is a beautiful thing for those of us who choose to be sexually active. I know it consumes the majority of my thoughts on most days. The one-night stand, “booty call,” and the making of love between two adults all have one thing in common — both participants want to feel good.

The key to healthy sex is open communication between participants. In any sexual act, both parties should not only consensually desire the interaction but should also be in agreement on what is fair game and what is not allowed.

Communication is important in many ways. First and foremost, the participants can set boundaries with honest communication. If one person is uncomfortable with anything that might happen during sex, it can kill the mood for both people. So don’t try to get freaky without asking first. The phrases “Whoa, wrong hole,” or “What do you think you are doing?” should not be part of healthy sex dialogue.

Don’t get me wrong here — you don’t have to go through a checklist with a potential sexual partner, or talk about everything before you get started. But if you don’t know what is okay, just ask in a sexy way. If you want to do something that you aren’t sure your partner will enjoy, try talking dirty. Tell him or her why you want to perform the act, and watch both verbal and body language. Responses like: “The lube is over there” or “What are you waiting for?” seem pretty obvious, but if you are still unsure or confused by the response, ask if it’s okay.

So now that we know how important communication is, let’s move on. I’m not sure how my sexual appetite measures up to the rest of the population, but on an average day my libido rivals that of Austin Powers. What am I supposed to do when my partner has her friend with her?

No, I’m not talking about the ménage a trois, but keep your mind in the gutter (that’s where mine is). I’m talking about the monthly visitor that ladies welcome to their netherlands every month. The answer is: I make sweet, messy love to her.

Okay, for those of you that are repulsed right now, remember this word: communication. For some ladies, this might not be the right time for sex, but for others, the sex can be amazing. Unfortunately, not everyone is comfortable with the idea of being sexually active while one of the partners is “seeing red.” Since this is a natural occurrence for all beautiful women, I find it hard to believe that some people are grossed out by it.

There are a few downsides to sex on the rag, such as needing to put down a non-white sheet or towel to avoid making a mess out of your bed. However, I feel the benefits more than compensate for the few non-pleasantries about it. Here are some tips and advantages for having sex at “that time of the month.”

First, tell the gushing beauty that though she may feel like it is a not-so-sexy time of the month, you still can’t resist her charm and that tiny g-string. Like all sexual play, both parties must feel comfortable with sex in order for it to be passionate and beautiful. Likely, this particular period isn’t the first one she’s ever had and she is probably used to getting her period by now.

If she is still uncomfortable, chances are high that she’s worried about what you think. It is very important to assure her that you are not grossed out or uncomfortable. If you are uncomfortable or grossed out, then you probably aren’t ready to try this.

Once the idea is OK’d by both partners, try jumping in the shower. This is good on all sorts of levels. She will be rinsed off, and you can enjoy each other in the shower, which takes care of some of the foreplay and helps steam things up a bit.

Once she is convinced of your comfort with her body during menstruation, you might be surprised how much her comfort level with you increases. This is a very good thing, because more comfort with each other’s bodies translates to more fun.

Many women claim they are hornier during their period than other times of the month, and that the relaxation caused by orgasm relieves cramps, which comes as an added bonus for her and her partner. Less cramps means less crabby, and which would you prefer: taking Midol or having sex?

Keep in mind that with anything sexual, some things are good for some, and not as good for others. So take a dip in the Red River if it’s good for you and your partner, but please don’t knock it until you try it. As always, be a safe swimmer, and make sure your one-eyed sailor wears a life jacket.