Eric says:
Zach Lambo's hair gets a little more publicity since he gets to show it off during soccer games, but let's be honest — he's just doing his best Jeff Likens impression. And no offense to Likens, but Joe Piskula's sophomore look is the best hair on campus … just ask the ladies.
Once a finalist for Wisconsin's "Mr. Hockey" award given out the best prep player, the second-year defenseman is now up for "Mr. Hockey Hair."
In fact, the move to the longer locks may have been the best move of his career. One year ago, Piskula showed up on campus with the simple look — one that I have yet to grow out of, excluding my first semester of freshman year. One year later, the blonde blue-liner from Antigo, Wis., looks like he hopped off a surfboard and onto the Kohl Center ice.
That's right, Piskula's new look is almost out of UW's league. It's not even a fair fight. He deserves just as much to wear Baywatch red as he does Badger red.
Let's face it, Lambo went to the Tom Ziemer school of beauty — just grow the hair out as long as you can, no matter how bad it looks.
Once inspired by his fellow Badger defensemen to grow his hair out, now they are probably advising him to cut it off and stop stealing their ladies. In fact, I'm guessing they make sure not to bring the ladies up — it probably just sounds like "Joe, your hair is just too pretty for a hockey player. … You'd better chop it off."
Yes, Piskula is the envy of all the guys on campus — and most of the girls.
However, it's too bad we aren't living in the late 1970s so we could have experienced the best UW hair ever, sported at that time by current men's hockey head coach Mike Eaves.
Tom says:
No contest here. Zack Lambo not only has flowing locks — he's got versatility, kids. Anyone who showed up for the Wisconsin men's soccer team's first match of the year saw a shocking surprise — Lambo with corn rows.
For those who weren't, here's a quick reference for y'all. Remember former Oklahoma quarterback Jason White's medusa locks from a couple years back? Yeah, Lambo followed White's lead and busted out some sweet rows.
They worked out pretty nicely for him, too. Lambo sent a splendid free kick into the box to set up captain Aaron Hohlbein's equalizer for the Badgers in an eventual 2-1 comeback win. For the year, Lambo has two helpers from the back line — and there's no way that is a coincidence. Two hairstyles = two assists = too cool.
So let's break it down, by the numbers style. Lambo is 5-foot-10 and 170 pounds with hair that, when pulled back in a David Beckham-esque look, creeps down nearly to the shoulder line. Joe Piskula, on the other hand, stands 6-foot-3 and 214 pounds. His blonde locks flow down the sides (yes, that's a middle part) to near the shoulder. Thus, Lambo clearly has the better hair-length-to-body-size ratio. And any time you can be mentioned with Beckham, you earn a win in the hair category.
Yes, Piskula has some sweet potential with the hockey hair. But still, it took him a year in Madison to rid himself of the Eric Schmoldt look. And honestly, people … check out the mugs … yeah, you know which one of us knows hair.