Leave it to ABC News to make a mountain out of a molehill. Or a nuclear reactor, for that matter.

The news organization's report on the University of Wisconsin's nuclear facility — as well as those of several other schools — appears to be little more than a hyperbolic abuse of scare-tactic journalism by those looking to spoon with Nielsen households. While UW is admonished by the network news operation for lackadaisical security, the report fails to demonstrate so much as a single concrete vulnerability to Madison's water-submerged uranium.

Still, the reality is that a moderately-sized hunk of nuclear material is sitting at the heart of the UW campus — in the neighborhood of a stadium that seats some 80,000 people and a short walk from the Capitol. ABC News's revelation that security for the site is lacking — an observation highlighted by an apparent lack of guards, magnetometers and daytime locks — is disturbing, even if one is left to ponder just how much harm could be done without raising more red flags than a New Year's celebration in Tiananmen Square. For one, we are led to believe that saboteurs may be ultimately deterred by the toxic nature of the water standing between them and the coveted uranium — not to mention the many other inherent security measures seemingly conquerable by only Daniel Ocean.

Yet, with Wisconsin receiving far more Homeland Security-earmarked funding than could be possibly applied to the mass-protection of dairy cows, we are left to contemplate if this site wouldn't be an optimal place for some preventative spending. Surely Milwaukee's skyline can benefit from a piece of such federal pork — as can Lambeau Field, given its tremendously symbolic nature and heavy capacity — but we also feel that a slab of uranium beneath a major university in a mid-sized city should not go unnoticed. Heavier security can never hurt and so long as Congress stubbornly insists upon dispersing Homeland Security money based on state size — not likely vulnerability to an attack — Wisconsin ought to at least put its funds to good use. Greater physical barriers as well as an entourage of armed guards not battling insomnia would seem wise.

And, for the mean time, we would strongly recommend that professors cease giving attractive tote-bag-bearing graduate students free tours of the reactor without appropriate background checks.