To steal a line from Bernie Mac, undoubtedly one of the finest modern television fathers, “When a kid reaches 1-year old, I believe you have the right to punch them in the throat and the stomach. You see, I’m from the old school — I’ll kick a kid’s ass. When you’re old enough to talk back, you’re old enough to get fucked up!”
Although Mac might have taken it to an extreme, I strongly believe corporal punishment has made me the man I am today (…at least the part of me that most resembles a man). I don’t think there’s a more constructive way to have children realize and correct the error of their ways. It certainly helped me realize there are consequences to my every action and eventually, over a period of several years, I became forever cognizant of this fact. I think my parents knew this, as they too were products of such punishment and found it an effective way to raise their children. I also know they didn’t enjoy it and used it only when they felt they had to. (At least I hope so.)
When I was young, I got spanked and had my mouth washed out with soap when I acted up or said something inappropriate. Such punishment was usually saved for extreme cases, but these actions didn’t occur with much frequency. Though at the time I may have thought differently, I certainly believe I deserved all the spankings I received.
I have vivid memories of running up to my room and locking the door after pushing my sister and hearing the loud sound of my parents’ footsteps in hot pursuit. I can remember crying in my room as the lock was being taken off the door, knowing what was coming and asking myself, “Why did I have to push her?” Yes, a little bit of fear they instilled in me, but can you really be a good parent without inciting a little bit of fear in your children? Besides, the next time, I thought twice about pushing my sister — although my parents also instilled a strong sense of stubbornness in their eldest child.
The other day I was discussing these incidences with some friends, and we seemed split on the issue. About half of us met some form of corporal punishment growing up, and the other half really had no idea such punishment occurred in households very similar to theirs. Soap and spankings were the norm, sometimes wooden spoons or hairbrushes were mentioned — nothing too serious.
Those who were not corporally punished were appalled that such techniques were used. They characterized it as child abuse. Like Mac said, it’s an old school technique with connotations of it being dated. New principles of political correctness and a progressive thread in society have aimed to sew what is seen as a collective error in our ways. These more progressive parents have refused corporal punishment and have told their children such actions are wrong. But many still maintain its validity even in the face of an ever-changing society.
For those who weren’t met with spankings or soap, being grounded or sent to their rooms seemed like their average punishment. Stern punishments they are not, but for those who faced them it seemed as though they got the message across for the most part. All of us included in the discussion seemed to have turned out without detriment, but we’re all our parent’s children. What was effective with them will be effective with our kids. For those of us who took our comeuppances, we firmly believe in the constructiveness of corporal punishment. For this guy, one swift hand to the ass will say more than words ever can.
Drew Hansen (
