A new anonymously conducted study shockingly uncovered what may be the thief of all joy. 30 participants, all of various ages, gender identities, races, lines of work and whatever else makes this study sound real, were randomly placed into groups.

Each group of participants was required to tune into their assigned news source for two months. Through eight long and vigorous weeks of sitting in front of a TV, the participants revealed what may be the biggest discovery since half-swiping on Snapchat. Each and every participant who strictly consumed Fox News media exhibited significantly decreased levels of joy.

How did they prove their happiness was depleted, you may ask? It’s simple: each victim of the sight of Tucker Carlson’s face blown up to the size of the study’s 65 inch flat screen TV was shown various photos and videos that typically spark happiness in humans a week after the study was conducted.

This media included puppies licking their mothers, Jonathan Bailey performing “Dancing Through Life,” baby birds flying for the first time, Kylie Jenner waking up her baby via the words “rise and shine,” and of course America’s sweetheart Bad Bunny. Shockingly, participants had a visceral reaction specifically to the clips of Bad Bunny.

Although intervening with scientific study is considerably looked down upon, researchers deemed it necessary to correct various participants — informing them that Puerto Rico is in fact a part of the United States. According to the summary of findings, reported feelings of general sadness, anger or discomfort increased by up to 5% after the disclosure of the true geographical location of Puerto Rico.

So what did we learn? Joy is a fragile thing. If you or loved ones have hopes of feeling any sense of happiness in your lives, myself and researchers alike strongly advise against the consumption of media outlet Fox News.

So enjoy the halftime show with the profound pride that you are a normal, kind, functioning person. Maybe even get a Duolingo streak going before the performance, refresh your memory of “Debí Tirar Más Fotos.” Just try to find joy in the fact that every day it gets clearer and clearer who watches SNL and who doesn’t.