It’s the beginning of October, and you know what that means: glitter, wigs, and pop-culture references that were only funny for a week last March. We all know choosing a costume isn’t easy, but are you really aware of the five stages that will accompany this year’s holiday season?
1. The classic dilemma of hot or funny
First, we have to get one thing straight: are you feeling more vampire that apparently wears a corset or Tobias Fünke on his journey to joining the Blue Man group? This is the mental turmoil girls around the country are facing every year. One friend suggests a group costume of Disney princesses. Another wants to go as the cast of Shrek. Your Apple watch notifies you your heart rate is abnormal — it’s beginning.
2. The idea you saw on TikTok that everyone else is going to do
After hours of scrolling on TikTok for a costume, you land on Florence Pugh in “Don’t Worry Darling”. You show up to the party elated with your decision of such a good yet niche costume. You’re matching ten other girls.
3. Finally making a decision, then realizing not a single part of your costume will come before Halloween
You graduate from scrolling Tik-Tok to scrolling Amazon, and you feel like the world is at your fingertips. “Sabrina Carpenter ruffle shorts”, “Lola from Shark Tales wig”– you name it. Suddenly after crafting what you believe to be the perfect costume in your cart, you read the worst combination of four words known to man: “may come after Halloween”. Go back to stage 1.
4. Scavenging your apartment for anything that could be considered part of a costume
Some may call this stage bargaining with your closet. That sparkly blue dress you kept for some reason from freshman year homecoming? Elsa. The oversized blazer and random sunglasses you own? Spy. At this point, anything is a costume.
5. Inevitably throwing on a cowboy hat and calling it a day
This costume-debacle has lasted weeks. With your creativity gone and ambition dead, you pathetically reach for the cowboy hat in the back of your closet and throw it on with a jean skirt and tank top. Next year, you’ll have the best costume anyone’s ever seen. (You won’t.)
