Somebody get Ted Thompson on the line! Pronto!
I've got an idea that's going to blow your mind. I am firmly convinced Rex Grossman is pretty much the worst quarterback ever to (dis)grace a football field, and that the Bears are going the way of the Super Bowl Shuffle if they keep Mr. Gross-man as their quarterback.
So who should step up and be the 21st different starting quarterback for the Bears since Packers great Brett Favre started his consecutive-games streak back on Sept. 20, 1992?
Why, how about Mr. Favre himself?
Yeah, I know, this is like Babe Ruth going from the Boston Red Sox to the New York Yankees (and playing in seven World Series, winning four), or Adam Vinatieri leaving the Patriots for the Colts (Super Bowl XLI), or Ray Bourque going to win his first Cup with the Avalanche. Geez, poor Beantown.
But this would be worse, right? You can't have the most iconic football player of the past 15 years leaving the Packers for another team! And for the Chicago Bears, no less! Can this happen?
You "Brett" your sweet bippy it can. I've got a doozy of an idea for a trade that just might work out for everybody.
First, let's consider the state of each franchise.
Chicago just lost the Super Bowl, and risks falling into the dreaded curse of the Super Bowl loser next season. At the same time, take out the quarterback, and the Bears have themselves a pretty good team — one that legitimately could call itself the strongest team in the league — and most definitely that of the NFC.
On the other hand, Green Bay's roster has more holes than a cart full of Swiss cheese. Favre's a halfway decent option at quarterback, but he's no Tom Brady or Peyton Manning anymore. And let's face it: While he certainly gives the Packers a chance in 2007, No. 4 won't be around forever (contrary to popular belief around the state).
The Bears need nothing but a decent quarterback, and the Packers need a plethora of good players to build for the long haul. Do I smell a deal? Ya Brett-cha. Ah yes, I can see it now, on the SportsCenter bottom line…
BREAKING NEWS: Packers QB Brett Favre has been traded to the Bears for the rights to every draft choice Chicago owns in the 2007 and 2008 drafts… and $50 million.
Seriously. Sometimes, my own brilliance frightens me to no end.
Tell me this isn't genius! The Bears are almost certain to win Super Bowl XLII, Favre can retire with a second championship ring (along with all those passing records … here's a tissue, Mr. Marino, and a bottle of anti-depressants, Mr. McGrath), and the Packers — as terrible as they may be next season — are on the fast track to winning a couple of Super Bowls in about four or five years.
My guess is Bears fans would jump on this bandwagon a lot quicker than Packers fans. Even the most die-hard supporters are usually welcoming when a star player comes to town, no matter where he's been or what he's done.
But in speaking with Pats fans about Vinatieri's newest bling, my guess is Cheeseheads would sooner swear off brats and Miller Lite than see Favre play for Da Bears.
How's this: Favre sticks around for the first half of the season or so, breaks Marino's touchdown record, yadda yadda yadda. Then, at season's midpoint, when the Bears are 7-1 in spite of Rex and most definitely not because of him (I'm talking to you, Lovie), Chicago offers all their draft picks up to the then-2-6 Packers, who at this point are more than willing to let Brett end his career on a high note instead of a weekly debate as to whether Aaron Rodgers should start in place of the Packer legend.
There, now everybody's happy. Right?
Right?
Aaron Brenner is a sophomore majoring in journalism and really doesn't hate Brett Favre as much as he may let on most of the time. Send all that Brett love to [email protected].
