You hear it all the time in life: people complaining about being treated as nothing more than a number. It implies impersonal service and getting lost in the shuffle of bureaucracy. Most people would rather be called by their own name than be referred to as Customer No. 9927867.
But still, in large part, numbers define who you are. Think of all the numbers you use as identification every day: your student ID number, bank account number, social security number, even your phone number.
Instead of being bothered by this numerological approach to classifying people, I embrace it. In fact, one number in particular means more for me than anything else. It provides a light at the end of the tunnel, a reward for years of hard work and sacrifice, much like social security (hopefully).
For myself and several tens of thousands of others just like me out there, it is my place on the Green Bay Packers season ticket waiting list.
But there are so many ways to look at the numbers, it’s only right to run it down Arsenio Hall style.
That’s right, in honor of the leader of the Dog Pound and host of the short-lived reincarnation of Star Search, let's delve into the Packer season ticket waiting list and beyond.
As Arsenio would say, "Hit me with the digits!"
68,784 — My place on the season ticket waiting list. It is a number that is actually ludicrous just to look at. Thanks to an egregious instance of parental oversight, my father missed an opportunity to either a) place his newborn son on the season ticket list some 20-odd years ago or b) put my name on the list once I began to show an unhealthy affinity for sports and the Packers in particular. This would have been around age 4, when I would only eat green food or food packaged in green boxes.
Instead, I was left to my own devices, putting my own name on the list at age 18 and dejectedly receiving the first postcard, which informed me my initial place was north of 70,000.
4 — Number of tickets each person on the list can request, essentially making 68,748 something a little closer to 260,000.
76.43 — Number of years, rounded to the hundredths place, until 68,784 turns into one, assuming the current rate of moving up approximately 900 spots a year continues. A sobering fact, considering at that point, I would be fortunate to be still alive and eating solid food. If I’m still kicking, when the postcard arrives at the nursing home bearing the good news, I’ll likely break a hip or two. But I’ll walk it off. That's what Brett would do anyway.
In other words, my great-grandchildren had better like football.
1 — Number of women with ties to season tickets I would date. Why only one? Because that’s all it would take.
Not to be labeled superficial or anything, but if my best shot to get to see the Packers on a regular basis won’t come until sometime when I’m darn close to pushing the century mark, why not take the short cut if possible. Considering season ticket holders can will them down through family, why not find a nice girl whose family happens to have some tickets for the Green and Gold and set up shop?
Just kidding. Partially. Maybe.
1959 –The last year Packers tickets were not sold out on a season-ticket basis. That stretches 249 games and includes a stretch from 1973 to 1988 when the team won no more than eight games in a season.
But the season-ticket numbers don’t stop there. Here on campus, the Wisconsin football and basketball teams both see tremendous support.
99.5 — The percent of UW basketball season ticket holders who renewed their tickets for the 2007 season, a percentage that is absolutely remarkable. Considering the Kohl Center holds just over 17,000, and each ticketholder likely holds two or more tickets, that means about 40 people who had season tickets last season chose not to re-up.
5 — Consecutive seasons the Kohl Center has been sold out just from season tickets, an impressive feat considering the Badgers don’t exactly have a storied basketball history.
28 — Wisconsin has sold out its last 28 home football games, and has drawn more than 70,000 to 92 consecutive games.
There you have it. As they say, the numbers don’t lie.
Ben is a junior majoring in journalism and political science. If you have any Packers tickets he could have, or you have season tickets and would like to adopt him, e-mail him at [email protected]. If you have season tickets and are looking for a date, please take a number. Don’t think you’re the only one.