One year ago, the sports world was turned upside down after Bud Selig declared the 73rd All-Star game a tie. Unlike the rest of the world Milwaukee remained upright, home to the strange and impossible.
In a scene looking like something from Ripley’s Believe it or Not, an unarmed Italian Sausage was struck down while leading the traditional Sausage Race at Miller Park. The perpetrator was Pittsburgh Pirates first basemen Randall Simon. In the ensuing frenzy, the blow knocked out another sausage and led to the arrest of Simon after the game.
Was it coincidence that Simon just happened to attack the Italian sausage and not the American hog. This attack might be the tip of a larger issue. While the nation struggles with more dire issues such as affirmative action or the aftermath in Iraq, those in control of the wiener races may have to deal with a possible hate crime. Next time, it could be the Polish sausage.
It’s not like there wasn’t an eerie shadow over the night to begin with. It was just a year ago that the MLB All-Star game ended in a tie when both teams ran out of pitchers.
Another factor in the attack could be the use of performance enhancing drugs. Many have accused a number of ballplayers of using steroids. Just ask Ken Caminitti and Sammy Sosa–wait, don’t ask Sammy (see Rick Reilly, Sports Illustrated, 7-2-02). After the incident, Simon said he barely tapped the Italian sausage. However, that little tap wielded by someone under the influence of steroids or undergoing roid rage may have been a lot more than the Italian sausage could handle. Judging by the unidentified innards left on the third base line, this could be the case.
Glendon Rusch continued the odd night by pitching well. Just back from Triple A Indianapolis, Rusch looked like his old self and ended a hideous streak of starts dating back to April.
I don’t know about all of you, but there is this feeling I have about this year’s team. Since early May, the Brewers have played .500 ball and have been in the position to win the last four series they have played. Jenkins is in the All-Star game, the Brewers are less than ten out and we are just at the halfway point in the season. There is also this guy named Scott Podsednik who has reached safely in 40 straight games.
The Brewers are winning and sausages are getting knocked up. Ahh, summer in Milwaukee. I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Derek Montgomery ([email protected]) is a junior majoring in journalism and political science.