In Opinion, we don’t like easy decisions. As a section that thrives on the thrill of argument, intuitively obvious choices are diametrically opposed to our love of debate. Thus, the opinion desk is unrepentantly disappointed by the District 8 race for Madison‘s Common Council. With Bryon Eagon so obviously the superior candidate, the electoral debate, with regard to the district, savors of anticlimax.

First and foremost, there is Eagon’s ridiculously adequate safety plan. Eagon has laid out a coherent, wide-ranging policy that addresses both the short- and long-term aspects of crime in Madison, including the creation of a comprehensive safety organization that will include representatives from all parties involved, attempting to review the Downtown Safety Initiative to decrease bar raids (an idea that, to his credit, Woulf advocated — though less articulately), and addressing the long-term causes of poverty in Madison.

Then there are Eagon’s proposals on tenants’ issues. Long one of the most abused demographics in Madison, tenants have had a rough go of things as landlords have been essentially free to take security deposits at will, among other charming manifestations of their seeming consensus that students are very much uninformed and therefore ripe for the picking. From including a description of tenant rights in contracts with landlords to increasing interest rate returns on security deposits, Eagon left absolutely nothing to be desired in his efforts to win Eli Judge’s seat on Common Council.

Dearest to many of our hearts, there is Eagon’s proposal to reorder the Alcohol Licensing Density Plan, mandating that the Licensing Committee review liquor licenses on a case-by-case basis. Oh yeah, and just in case Eagon hadn’t demonstrated that he was utterly well-informed on almost every issue facing Madison, Eagon also has alternative policies on snow management that have been proven to work — at least in Seattle.

So basically, from the controversy-starved opinion section, all we can really ask is: What the fuck, Eagon?

At not a single point did you formulate a policy or make a statement that was at odds with the interests of your constituents. Every issue you chose to address was taken on in an appropriate manner with the just the right tempering of (semi-robotic) moderation. Your chances of success in most of your proposals are excellent. You consistently demonstrated a willingness to do your homework via meetings with local leaders and a desire to consider the interests of all involved parties that gives even your respected predecessor a run for his money.

On the contrary, your opponent cited bar raids as to some extent responsible for the early-morning assault of a student. He is also widely accused of distributing cookies to get himself more votes in the primary, which you won handily. Not only is the choice for District 8 obvious, it is inarguable.

So, Bryon, while you’ve done a superb job running the best campaign either of us has witnessed at the local level, we have to say, we’re a little irritated. Through research and hard work, you made it far too obvious that you were the superior choice for District 8. You overcame a misspelled first name and starved us of material in the process. Next time just give us some damn cookies.