Proverbs for deep discount designer shopping are this week’s beatitude.
Gato, Lillian and Jenna Bush were sharing knosh and a few pints of Goose Island at Streetside Café (3201 W. Armitage, Chicago 773-252-9700) near Lillian’s Logan Square apartment. Magda, Gato and Jenna’s Manager drank a pint of Grey Goose. “It’s still hard for me to order drinks in English,” was her reoccurring excuse.
The party had returned from successful bargain shopping in New York City and were rounding out spring vacation with a night of hopping around Chicago Polish bars before Gato returned to Madison.
Streetside serves as both cool DJ lounge and neighborhood bar, attracting a rainbow crowd with dance music and $3.50 import taps.
Exiting Streetside, a couple of cocky male patrons took a double take and asked Jenna, “Aren’t you the president’s daughter?” She replied in a thick, big, blonde-haired Texas accent, “Yeah, my daddy is president of the Garden Weasel Corporation; you worked for him?”
Adding to the Chanelgate scandal, Secret Service agents tasked to Jenna started moonlighting as bouncers so Jenna could enjoy herself as just Jenna.
Fortunately, Dan Rather, poorly disguised as ’60s Spanish lounge diva La Lupe, didn’t get photos of the shopping bags piled in the backseat of Jenna’s pimped-out pink Dodge Neon.
Most of the loot was Gato and Jenna’s. Both being night crawlers and morning people, they did NYC shopping as a tag team. Besides, Jenna’s teaching job only had health insurance, not a wardrobe allowance.
“Gato, you follow a set of rules looking for bargain fashion; don’t you?” Jenna asked.
Yes, and as fake flower-power Vuitton’s got the way of Social Security reform, the masses need something more. Gato shares his secrets here.
Filine’s Basement on 19th and 6th Avenue in NYC has been hyped in “Opulence Addict” before. Recently, Magda found spring-color Prada pumps there, and because they were only $79, Jenna nabbed them. Per that mention here’s Rule #1:
Labels don’t just dump extras or rejects at places like Filine’s and TJ Maxx, they often test market new off-the-rack lines there. Unfortunately, quality can vary because when a couture house goes prêt-a-porter, quality in outsourcing components varies greatly. All of us remember Maureen Dowd’s column on Juicy Couture’s fiasco with faulty zippers.
Fashion economy in the U.S.A. is a strange thing and tastemakers often lack the paychecks to satiate their next-thing desires. Hence, placing names they could once only talk about on the racks of this seemingly mundane chain, is a way of getting the style on the streets.
Rule #1a: Sometimes “dumped” items never make the final cut. Most of Gato’s French Connection shirts (purchased for $15 to $25 at this Filine’s) represent director’s cut clothes. Depending on how fake-rich you want to fake it, wearing anomalies might make you feel like a poser or even more elite.
Rule #2: Sometimes fakes aren’t fakes. Since the early boom in America’s garment industry, workers have been turning out extras that get sold to shadowy men in the steam-rising-out-of-sewers early morning. Instead of watching TV, study the stitching and details on the real stuff and finding props for your high-fashion front, you can pick out genuine items.
Jenna and Magda were accosted by a man carrying an armful of $60 Seven Jeans. Jenna thinks fakes are real laissez-faire capitalism, so she bought a pair for Michael Powell. He’d been working in community access TV in Silver Springs, Maryland since leaving the FCC, and things were tight all over, including his new 2-hours-at- the-gym-daily butt.
Gato decided to 87 his pseudo purchase. Besides, Seven is American made, and Gato would rather wear Bongo jeans than undermine best practices.
“What about Toughskins?” Jenna asked. “Now that would be super-Hamms-Beer Bear cool retro.”
Rule #3: Heed thy sample sale lists and get signed up for e-mail alerts. After fashion week, many sample extras get dumped at the 6th Ave. Filine’s, and some even find their way to Chicago’s Downtown State Street store. Two years ago Gato nabbed a pair of Miu Miu pants in The Chi Filine’s for $30.
Magda registered Jenna’s Blackberry for e-mail alerts at www.nysale.com. However, some of the best sample sales serve as charity functions, the best being the annual Hampton’s event. Scan the social pages in any big city for upcoming benefits that help the cause of starving 20-something upward mobility.
On the same tip, when traveling to New York, take a jaunt on the Path Train to Jersey City and visit Sample Sale (510 Jersey Ave., (201) 432-8500).
Rule #4: Be ahead of the curve on a brand’s adoption into the mass conscious. Often, discount stores, especially those outside of the orbits of consumer-frenzy friendly cities, will overprice well-known brands while under-pricing far more exclusive brands.
This is especially true of names that lost their caché and are being revived or labels that are forging for wider recognition. As an example, Gato found three pairs of Cole Hann styles for under $60 in Wisconsin discount chains. This spring, Cole Hann ads with a updated look were ubiquitous on lower Broadway.
Back at New York’s Filine’s, to compliment her $50 Chip and Pepper Jeans, Jenna nabbed a pair of this season’s $250 Beverly Feldman’s for $70. To contribute to the scandal, her credit card read, “Department of Education.”
In order to maintain public salivation for exclusive labels, — overpriced designer jeans for example — who can buy the brand is highly controlled. However, if one scours Manhattan in the ’50s before Central Park, there are immigrant-owned boutiques that have a limited size selection of the most coveted names.
Finally, Jenna needed perfume. Condi also wanted a bottle of Chanel Chance. “Guarding the free world can make a diva feel old,” she said in an e-mail. Gato went to House of Perfume (1170 Broadway 212-213-5344). No fakes, great prices, and they take multiple bottle orders over the phone or via fax.
Next week: blender drinks and recipes for a desert party
