H 78°, L 55° | Tomorrow: 
H 85°, L 67°Gone are the days of sock hops and fountain drinks — replaced instead by fleeting sexual interaction.
But Princeton University's newest student organization, The Anscombe Society, which has garnered national attention over the last several weeks, seeks to promote chastity and restore the traditional views of courtship — something noticeably absent on this campus.
During my time as a student here, I have come to realize that "hooking up" is tolerated more often than being a virgin. Regrettably, students who choose to practice abstinence are often branded with a proverbial scarlet letter "V." And because of this supposed stigma, it seems that those who choose to practice this lifestyle are few and far between.
Let's face it. My views on sex have prompted many to call me puritanical, and others to believe my father is the Bible-toting Ned Flanders on "The Simpsons."
Given the current situation on this campus, I am reminded of a line from the chick flick, "Win a Date With Tad Hamilton," when Pete tells the love of his life to "guard your carnal treasure" as she boards a plane to have a date with a famous movie star. Unfortunately, this campus is not conducive to those who choose to save their "treasure."
The Anscombe Society — and others like it around the country — seeks to promote and encourage "an atmosphere where sex is dignified, respectful, and beautiful." The organization appears to be a respectable response to the currently prevailing attitudes towards sex on America's college campuses.
This university, though, is more charitable to such organizations as Sex Out Loud — a group that seeks to promote sexuality through sex education and activism. The activism they refer to includes providing "facilitators" such as sex toys, porn, erotica, role-playing, and S&M to students — all paid for by student segregated fees.
Something tells me that Abstinence Out Loud would be less well received.
What accounts for this intolerance of abstinence by college students, though? Over the years, the attitude toward sex among college students has increasingly become that of acceptance. Several factors have contributed to this widely held view of the intimate act, including the sexual revolution, creation of effective and inexpensive contraception, widespread cultural acceptance of infidelity and divorce, and a culture that has detached itself from a firm commitment to family.
As Cyndi Lauper's "Girls Just Want to Have Fun" plays in the background, it's easy to see that a significant amount of college students adhere to the steadfast mantra of live in the present with no consideration for the future.
But why must there be such hostility to groups that promote chastity and the individuals who comprise them? The intent of such organizations is to engage the university community in a dialogue about issues regarding sex and relationships. These groups also seek to provide support to those who choose to remain abstinent during their college career.
Doesn't this campus advocate tolerance? Maybe we should practice what we preach.
Nonetheless, these organizations on college campuses seem like a more plausible solution than the alternative.
We could be students at the University of Notre Dame, where sex is stated in the student code of conduct to be a "genuine and complete expression of love" that requires "a commitment to a total living and sharing together of two persons in marriage." Those found in violation of this policy could be subject to suspension or permanent dismissal.
Perhaps I should have given more thought to their offer of admission a few years ago.
This campus should realize that college students who practice abstinence are not anti-sex. Rather, they are waiting for the right person and for marriage. Those who do not practice abstinence may associate the decision to postpone sexual activity with the Christian "True Love Waits" campaign — complete with a ring or commitment card. But it's more complex than that. It's a lifestyle choice — regardless of a symbolic gesture.
Maybe it wouldn't be so bad if those who practiced chastity were indeed forced to wear the proverbial "V" on their clothing. At least they would be more identifiable to those who seek them out for a relationship.
Darryn Beckstrom ([email protected]) is a doctoral student in the department of political science and a second-year MPA candidate in the La Follette School of Public Affairs.
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You know what? This column almost made actual sense, unlike most weeks. Your position on abstinence is perfectly reasonable. The only problem is that you seem almost maniacal in your quest to pose your group (if you are in it) as victimized by the cruel, oversexed institution that is the University of Wisconsin. In general, you do this every week. Yet you provide no evidence that the university as such is at all intolerant or even disapproving of your position. What is it with this new mantra of conservative victimhood that we are constantly forced to endure? I honestly don’t get it. You run every branch of government, you dominate political commentary, your foundations and thinktanks and advocacy organizations are generously funded and active…in short, you have every advantage a political and social movement could want. So why are you still whining?
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I really love Tuesdays. Another Tuesday means another crazy rant from Beckstorm. Let's list the reasons she is crazy this week.
As someone who didn't have sex in college, not for lack of want, but for lack of time, I was never made to feel pressured by the people I knew who were having sex (which was not that many). I’m not sure what sex depraved freaks you hang out with, but I am fairly sure that the “pressures” you speak of aren't as big as you and the righties would like to believe.
No sane rationale human being is opposed to abstinence for its own personal reasons. However, the true motive that brought about this article is the puritanical right wing moon bats out there who want everyone to be only abstinent until marriage. This leads me to…
Your “sex out loud” reference and its inherent distain lead us all to the true crazy (and poorly written) point of this whole article: a below the radar for abstinence only education this administration has thrust (no pun intended) on society. This of course has to lead to more abortions and a generally destructive sexual climate as more and more young people hide their sexual activity from the purity police.
Darryn, everyone loves choice. Some people choose to have sex with many partners in their lives, some only one. If you think abstinence people are being persecuted on this campus, you need to (as your righties are so found of saying about Madison) get out and see the “real world”; which in this case exists in Madison, and promotes a tolerance of a wide range of sexual activity.
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Ladies and gentlemen, Ann Coulter!
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What you fail to understand, Darryn, is that when they talk about tolerance, they’re not talking about tolerance for you. They’re talking about tolerance for them. All attitudes and opinions are acceptable, except the ones they don’t agree with.
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Excellent article. Apparently Princeton has forgotten what is on its flag and its motto: “The open book is inscribed with ‘Vet. Nov. Testamentum’ (Old and New Testament). The motto, ‘Dei Sub Numine Viget,” translates as “Under the Protection of God She Flourishes.’”
It never ceases to amaze me that those who preach tolerance - a very deliberate choice of wording - are tolerant of anything and everything… except when something challenges their core beliefs.
They then mock, ridicule and scorn said opposing view. Practicing abstinence is no more anti-sex than not drinking is anti-drink.
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When you make an affirmative decision to be different than your peers you should expect to be singled out and get some weird looks. A sexually mature adult abstaining from sexual activity is unnatural. Whether its based on “morality” or some psychological issues, I don’t think anyone is burning phalluses on your lawn, so I don’t think you have it as bad as you’d like to report. You need to suck it up and accept that your decision puts you among the vast minority of sexually mature adults, and that causes others to veiw you differently.
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So your proof of hostility towards virgins on campus is a lack of support organizations for virgins on campus? Wow.
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more of the same from darryn beckstrom; poor me, i’m being victimized just because everyone else is different and has a different view.
please, stop.
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It’s ironic your editorial is timely in that nearly everyone on SSFC found it fine to fully fund condoms, condom cases, and lubricants last night. Students would fight hard if UW took a stance against their activities in the bedroom. Yet they love when the government provides them resources and encourages their sexual behavior.
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So start an abstinence club and apply for seg fee funding to educate impressionable freshmen on the virtues of abstinence.
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I hate to break it to you, but students at Notre Dame are having sex as often as we are.
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Personally, I think you need a good lay to wake you up to the real world.
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I wish you were having sex, then perhaps you would have less time to write these worthless columns.
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“Over the years, the attitude toward sex among college students has increasingly become that of acceptance. Several factors have contributed to this widely held view of the intimate act…” YEAH, MAYBE YOU SHOULD TRY AND YOU WILL UNDERSTAND THE #1 REASON WE ACCEPT IT…
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Yet again you argue that we should be more tolerant, but maybe YOU should start the effort. Surely you are smart enough to understand how you come off as a hypocrite when you champion tolerance but are intolerant to many others, gays being one prime example.
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It is NOT because of any stigma that virgins are few and far between, do you honestly believe that??
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“Perhaps I should have given more thought to their offer of admission a few years ago.”
Truly, I wish you had.
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“I hate to break it to you, but students at Notre Dame are having sex as often as we are.”
WHOO-HOO!!! Let’s give it up for the Tanner Hall orgy!
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Intolerant of gays and many others and other columns?!? Hell, she’s intolerant of Sex-Freaking-Out Loud in this very article. Putting the word facilitators in quotation marks? What was she really thinking….”Tools of Satan?”
Just when you thought that the Herald lost its righteous Christian moral crusader in Baumgartner, they give us an even bigger holy roller. At least Mark had a brain and pride in where he stood. I didn’t agree with him, but I was happy that he found somewhere he belonged.
Darryn whines so much about everyone else being treated unfairly, she reminds me of Dols. I’ll bet THAT comment’ll make her whine.
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If you don’t want to have sex, that’s great. Just because there’s not “Abstinence Out Loud” group doesn’t mean that people who choose not to have sex are under attack on campus. I know several people who are not having sex for various reasons, and they’re doing just fine. Most people just don’t care, to be honest.
How about we promise to not care what you do with your sex life, if you stop caring about what we do in ours?
P.S. As previously stated, it would be nice if you’d actually provide some evidence to back up your claims.
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What bothers me about this article is that no examples of intolerance towards vigrins are presented. I personally have met many people during my time at this university and have not yet once interacted with someone who is sexually active who said anything other than “Oh” to someone who is not (Sometimes, the former is interested in the motivation behind the latter’s decision, but only because it is interesting - and I’ve never seen anyone press the issue if the latter does not want to talk about it). Has a pro-abstinence group tried to get funding and been denied? Has something huge happened lately that has prompted this article? I really am just curious - Have I just been running into the right people on campus?
Anyone who could shed some light on this supposed intolerance with examples would be greatly appreciated, I really honestly just don’t know.
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Great column. When can I join Abstinence Out Loud?
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Are there any porn stars named Chastity? That would kick ass
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I especially loved reading the comments to this past column because I’m guessing most of the “commentors” are knocked up, washed up girls, or else people who are so STD-ridden that paying somebody to have sex with them even seems like a viable option at this point in their lives. So sorry.
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i think you are so totally right!!!!!!