How do we get condoms to feel good?
This year, the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation set out to find an answer to this very question when they announced the engineering competition of the century: a $100,000 prize for anyone who can design a condom that actually feels good or, even better, one that actually takes good old-fashioned boning to a turbo enhanced level.
See, Bill Gates is a pretty smart dude. So I’ve been told. While many innovative, though small-scale attempts have been made to eroticize condom use (tropical flavors, cool colors and even trendy vegan humanitarian condoms), the Gates couple gets that people have sex so that their genitals feel tingly, not so that they can collect cutesy packaging or turn their dicks into makeshift light sabers.
But Mr. Gates may have overlooked a few things. First, I venture a guess that most people don’t like the feeling of condoms because they are using them incorrectly. (That’s a separate topic for a later column.) More importantly, we’ve already seen the “next generation condom.” It’s hardly new, since the first edition was approved by the FDA in 1993 and the second in 2009. It doesn’t get as much press coverage because not everyone’s marketing budget is as big as Trojan’s.
It’s called the female condom, or as I like to call it, the receptive condom. It’s a barrier method that goes on the inside of the receptive partner’s sex hole instead of covering the insertive partner’s equipment. Get the picture?
“Sam, you mean that weird tube sock thing that looks like a plastic bag?” Hey, don’t knock it till you try it—and try it correctly—’cause this thing has some serious pleasure enhancing capabilities. Don’t worry Badgers, I’ve taken on the grueling task of doing the dirty work and testing out receptive condom for you. Here’s a review from one gal who loves safe sex.
Among the things I absolutely love about this condom:
You can insert this baby up to eight hours before intercourse, which can make for some seriously spontaneous, roll-right-on-top-of-that-disco-stick sex. No need to play the “who has the condom” game because everything’s already in place and ready to go.
Receptive condoms are made out of synthetic nitrile, which means they can be used with oil-based lubes. So for people who love the feeling of slickity-slippery oil or like to go right from sensual oil massages to bangin’, this condom is your friend. Synthetic nitrile is also said to transfer body heat more easily than latex so it feels more like the “real thing”.
This condom has freakin’ built-in sex toys. How awesome is that? When rubbed the right way, the outer ring slides up and down over the clitoris and the inner ring gives a “pleasure bump” to the corona of a penis head moving in and out and side to side. Try this for a fun trick—instead of having the receptive partner put the condom in by themselves, make it a group activity. Face each other in the nude. While one person jerks off the other and you’re swirling tongues, have the other person use the ring of the condom to rub between the vaginal lips and against the clitoral hood. Once the receiver is too horny to stand it anymore, the inserter can move on to some finger fucking. Slip our fingers into the condom before doing this and you’ll finger bang that condom into place.
The receptive condom is a great tool to keep fluids in place during period sex. Now I’m all about period sex because the wetter the sex, the better the sex, and what better lube than a natural lube? I understand that the sight of blood can give some dudes castration anxiety and the aftermath can resemble a murder scene. Here’s the solution: Pop in a receptive condom and keep the fluids on the inside of the body.
Last, for people with herpes or HPV, this condom covers much more surface area than the insertive condom so, in theory, it provides great protection against passing those skin-to-skin transmitted STIs.
A few things to know before using the receptive condom:
First, make sure to put the condom in place at least 20 minutes before intercourse. Not doing this is the most common user error, since the condom needs time to “mold” to the vaginal walls and heat up.
Second, add more lube. Trust me, that thing may seem super lubey right out of the package, but, again, the wetter the sex, the better the sex.
Third, keep an eye on it, especially the first couple of times. Shoot for the hoop to avoid getting wedged into the side.