Happy Hump Day, Badgers! I’m joining the current sex columnists at The Badger Herald to help you get answers about your sexual curiosities and relationship woes. We’ve got a lot of questions that need answers, so let’s just get into it!
My girlfriend and I have been having sex now for around two months, but she still hasn’t gotten completely naked in front of me. Is that normal? Should I be worried about this? She’s got a great body, not overweight or anything, so I just don’t understand it.
While you shouldn’t be worried about the fact she won’t get naked in front of you, you should be concerned about why exactly that is. I don’t know if you’ve noticed this by now or not, but most women are sensitive to how they feel they look. Pay attention to that last part, how they feel.
You may think she’s hotter than Megan Fox, but for some reason we don’t always think we look the way others paint us to be. Whatever the reason is, she’s not comfortable enough to be able to take her clothes off and you need to figure out why. Not just so she will get naked for you when you want, but because it’s important to be comfortable, especially when it comes to the sexual part of a relationship. Communicate. Ask her what’s going on and if there’s anything you can do to help her become more comfortable. I know it’s hard for many people to do this, but hey, if you want to see her naked …TALK.
My boyfriend recently made a very odd request. He wanted to use foodstuffs in the bedroom, more specifically chocolate syrup. I’m not exactly sure how I feel about this…
This request may not be as odd as you think. Bringing food into the bedroom is meant to create a more stimulating sexual experience and can be pretty erotic. Many people get this idea in their head they need to be covered in food like the chocolate syrup scene from “American Wedding,” or they need to wear the infamous whipped cream bikini. Not the case. I really do believe in don’t knock it until you try it because you could be missing out on something that could really turn you or your partner on. Just start slow and work from there.
I like whipped cream because it’s not as messy and you don’t feel super sticky after. Don’t just spray some on and let him go at. It’s meant to be sensual and sexy. Tell him you’re going to put whipped cream in the spots you want his mouth to be, one by one. Work your way from your neck down to those erogenous zones. If you get comfortable with that you can work your way up to drops of chocolate syrup, honey or frosting, just to list a few delicious items people like to mix with their steamy sex sessions. Also, use this to your advantage! I don’t know many people who actually enjoy giving blowjobs, but add a little frosting and it’s all of a sudden a little more pleasant experience. Have fun with it! Although, be careful to not let any foodstuffs get into bodily openings such as the vagina, urethra, or anus because it could cause an infection.
I am, as people would say, well-endowed beneath the belt. But every time I try to have sex with my girlfriend (who is about 5-foot-5), I can’t go very long without hurting her. Is there anything I can do to make this work? Because we haven’t really ever been able to enjoy what people would say is a “normal” sexual experience.
First off, there is no such thing as a “normal” sexual experience, but each sexual experience should certainly be enjoyable for both partners. There are quite a few things that can be done to help you out in this situation. It already sounds like you’re both communicating, which is the first step that needs to be taken. Find out exactly what it is that’s hurting her. Is it the girth, the length, the motion, the pace or is it just all of it?
For each of these situations, make sure you’re using plenty of lube and keep reapplying as you go. She may not be producing enough natural wetness and this could alleviate that. Also, knowing it might hurt may be causing her to unconsciously tense her vaginal muscles, so make sure she’s relaxed. Do this by engaging in an adequate amount of foreplay time focusing on other areas, along with her vulva.
Now if it’s the length that’s being bothersome, remember, the bigger the angle of penetration the easier it is to push your penis in too far and hurt her. It may be hard for you to control this, so let her control the pace. Make sure she’s on top so she can do this and figure out how far she can let your penis go inside her before it starts to hurt. If this helps you can mix it up; try having her straddle you with her back facing you or straddle you while you’re sitting in a chair. Take it slow and go from there!
Until next time, stay extra safe and extra sexy on this Halloween/Homecoming weekend.
Elizabeth Taylor-Schiro is the newest addition to the Hump Day family. Say hello to the Hump Day ladies at firstname.lastname@example.org and get your sizzling questions answered.