Interesting review. Perhaps the reviewer should expend more effort listening to the subject than consulting a thesaurus. If the blatantly, painfully, mind-numbingly obvious humor behind this album doesn’t slap the reviewer in the face, the reviewer has far more to achieve to prove that she actually listened to the album.

Lords of the Trident are hardly a new band- and the song “Virgin Vault” refers to an old nickname of Liz Waters, which should have been pretty obvious if you can understand the reference to Rapeshore. They’re aiming for humor and inside jokes, thus their biography.

Honestly, I really think this article misses the whole point of Lords of the Trident.

Do you actually listen to the albums you critique? Or just put on a facade of interest and bash what you want? I’m not the obsessed fan disagreeing here. I’m an experienced musician and have to wonder what qualifies some fool to write such a bad article. Not agreeing with the musical direction is one thing and yes the singer is sometimes flat, nor do I particularly get into this style of music. What about the guitar work then? You cannot deny the skill and musicianship there yet as you put it, “the band lacks any musicianship”. Grow up and get over the pretentious fad of music critics in Madison and actually take some time to educate yourself.

In full disclosure, Brian Cole is the lead guitarist and songwriter for Lords of the Trident. So… he seems a little shaken by the review…

Never send a coastie to review a metal album.

“The lead singer has no real vocal ability.” - Really? What are you standards of vocal ability? Auto-tune?

Also, here are two contradicting statements:

“the album is lacking in any actual musicianship.” and “…Lords pack their breakout album with fierce drumming, complicated guitar solos…”

You can rag on the vocals all you want (which, by the way are falsetto, and not “growling” or “screaming” that you find in today’s metal), but you absolutely cannot deny that the guitar work is some of the best technical musicianship out there. If you don’t understand what I’m talking about, you shouldn’t be reviewing this album.

The Badger-Herald should be embarrassed about this review. The writer attempts cleverness, but shows ignorance about the music and a painfully obvious failure to actually listen to the album in question. Next time Allie, worry less about your panties and more about responsible journalism.

I just love how all those bashing the author of this article remain Anonymous. I feel as though I should support her regardless of any ignorance she may have just because she has the “juevos” to attach her name to her opinion. Kudos Allie!

I was at their concert last week—they are awesome!!!!! Fang Von Killinstein’s voice sounds as if it is summoning you from Mount Olympus to party with the rock gods…and the Socrates of Shreds shows you how it’s done once you make it up there…for shame, reviewer, for shame…

Hilary Von ThisBandIsAwesomeStein

Uhhh… Allie, you completely missed the joke. Must be embarrassing.

“Lords of the Trident’s self-composed biography seems like a complete joke, depicting band members as a volcanic creation”

How DARE you insinuate that I wasn’t born in a volcano!!! We volcano people have rights too you know. I’m calling the ACLU to report your blatant disregard for volcanic rights.

Also, your review is a joke. We have sick guitar riffs AND no musicianship?

mu⋅si⋅cian⋅ship /myuˈzɪʃənˌʃɪp/ [myoo-zish-uhn-ship] –noun knowledge, skill, and artistic sensitivity in performing music.

THIS BAND SOUNDS FANTASTIC! GIVE ME MORE!

You obviously have no sense of humor. If you’re ever allowed to write a review again, try doing some research on your subject. You know, going to shows or listening to albums. It’s called responsible journalism.

I thought this article was well written. Maybe some of you missed the point that the reviewer is entitled to her opinion, which she stated quite clearly. She was not supposed to be reviewing the humor of the lyrics, but the album as a whole. I’m sorry if you guys missed the point of her review…

True. She’s entitled to her opinion. But the language used makes it quite obvious that she does not like the genre, nor has any experience listening to any music in or close to the genre. This, I feel, is entirely the fault of the editor.

For example, I don’t like country music. If you gave me a country CD to review, I would probably give it a less than favorable review, even if it was the BEST country music CD of all time.

The review is also full of contradictions - how can a band have sick guitar riffs but complete lack of musicianship? Also, the “complete lack of vocal ability” is a GROSS exaggeration, to the point of being fabricated. If she could could give a reference point for vocal ability, she may have an argument.

The editor should have known better than to put a girl with a dislike of heavy music in charge of reviewing a metal CD.

This review could have been written by a fourth-grader with a thesaurus. Anyone who actually listened to the album would realize that the pleasure of its listeners comes not from its guitars (which are, indeed, totally “sick”), its vocals (which are, in point of fact, also sick), or its drums (which are both sick and digitally mastered). No, the pleasure of listening to Lords of the Trident comes from your sense of humor, panache, wit, and simple human decency. If you don’t think slavery is OK, you like this album. And to the person who posted an Anonymous comment “bashing” on others for posting anonymously: grow some balls, please. Sign me, Too Lazy to Register on the Badger Herald’s Website. Cheers -

Randall Merritt

This article shows a complete lack of understanding of this genre.

First off screaming is cliche? That’s like saying the violin is cliche in an orchestra. You can’t call something cliche when it is a defining part of something. And saying the lead singer has no vocal ability shows a complete lack of understanding of pop music as a whole. What about Bob dylan, Janis Joplin, Neil Young, and countless others with horrific voices? Good vocal ability is hardly a way to judge pop music especially a genre like metal.

“What could be controversial lyrics are sure to attract some (most likely your average campus stalker lurking in his dark and musty lair.” What are you basing these personal attacks on. Have you met anyone who enjoys this band? Have you asked them why they enjoy it? I am willing to bet the vast majority enjoy it for the humor factor. I happen to think their lyrics are hilarious, and I like to think I am socially well adjusted.

But personal attacks aside your discussion of lyrical themes only further enforces the idea that you have no idea what you are talking about. Apart from some sub-genres of metal (Black metal for one) metal lyrics are all a joke. Kiss’s Love Gun, AC/DC’s highway to hell, Iron Maiden’s Number of the beast, or any cannibal corpse song: do you think these bands were actually trying to put their worldviews into music? It’s all B slasher films in music form. It’s all an over dramatic farce.

And to the person who says the author is entitled to her opinion, that may be true but only as much as I am allowed to have an opinion on the social, economic, and political state of South Africa, something of which I know nothing about. So while I can make an uneducated opinion on it I at least have to common sense to keep my mouth shut about it.

I’m glad I helped contribute to the start of this shit go me I rule yeahhhh Metallll!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just come to a show, Allie. We’d even let you in for free (we being the Lords and friends). Seeing them in person should help to clear up any misconceptions you have about the band, as the live show makes obvious the clever humor behind their lyrics. If you’re willing to give us another shot, we’re willing to do the same for you.